Out
A series about Mars
by Daniel
E. Machado
Chapter 20
Departure day feels mostly familiar to
Roselene. But then again, in many ways very different. Before, when Roselene
was just little, the loss always seemed to come after the leaving, and
then only as some slowly dawning surprise. This time she knows the ones
she'll miss even before they're gone. John even said the same things Grandma
said before they left Oildale: "I’ll post you and always be watching out
for you on the publics."
But postings and publics aren't really
the same. Grandma Meg posts her almost every day, and can tell Roselene
nearly everything she's ever done. But that's not the same as being able
to crawl up into grandma's soft warm lap and hug her close. And as much
as she loves her cousin Fred nothing could ever replace the feeling
of strength she gets in her tiny fingers whenever John’s big strong hand
guides her through the ship's bustling power centers full of all those
hurried people and busy noise.
"Time to go, Sweety. Checkin's in
an hour and we don’t want to be late."
"I’m ready, Mommy." Pulling on her
tiny back-pack and fastening the safety strap across her chest the little
girl reaches down for the handle of her relatively huge personal effects
locker. Once again everything Roselene and her mother own has been packed
away into the long white cerametal boxes. And once again the two of them
must say good-by to another place. Smiling up proudly Roselene appears
even smaller than usual as she stands in the middle of their nearly empty
cabin.
"You’d better let me take that, Shorty."
Fred reaches for the locker handle.
"I can do it!" The tiny girl protests.
"I’m big enough!"
"Now, how about that?" Fred has to
admit that in the past year the girl has grown almost enough to handle
her own locker in the loading ring's .2gs of spin, but not quite. "You
teach a child to be independent and self-sufficient and what do they do:
Go out and start thinking and doing for themselves. The nerve of the little
ingrates."
"But, I can, Cousin Fred!"
Roselene protests. Cousin Fred talks total gibberish, but for some reason
it makes her mommy smile. "Mommy’s been taking me up into the pod every
day to her work so I could practice my zero-g. And they've been teaching
us at the center. Ms Lee says I’m the best in my level."
"I know you are, Sweety." Fred smiles.
Technically speaking Roselene is the only student at her level.
"I went with you as Ms Tem's aid on all those fieldtrips; remember? All
the same I think you should let me carry your locker up into the loading
ring. This thing still out-mass you."
"But you don’t have to be bigger,
Cousin Fred. Ms Lee showed us how you can steer a big mass with just little
bitty bumps." For no reason at all Cousin Fred’s face goes all wiggly as
if he's trying not to laugh, although a short chortle does manage to pop
out. Blade clears her throat at both of them.
"Will you two knock it off. We're
going to be late. Sweety, let Fred have your locker. Everyone's going to
be moving at once out there, and we’re all at least a year out of practice
at mass zero-g transfers. If you should lose control of your locker someone
might get hurt ."
"Oh, all right." Surrendering the
locker's handle Roselene slips both thumbs under her backpack's shoulder
straps and steps over toward the cabin's open hatch.
"Yes, ma’am." Fred quietly turns to
lift Roselene’s locker up onto his. "You go on ahead, I’ll bring up the
rear."
"Fred, I’m sorry I snapped at you.
It’s just that I'm feeling kind of…"
"Listen, Blade." Fred flashes up one
of his double-wide goof ball grins. "Don’t even think about it. I know
how it is. It's sort of the same with me. This cabin is probably the first
place I’ve lived in for more than a month since I first started training
with AeroDynamic two years ago. The place was getting to feel like a real
home, with real family. I'm feeling a little weird about walking out of
this place myself, so you didn't have to..." Fred finds Blade's sudden
warmth pressed against his chest, her cheek resting against his shoulder
as she hugs at him hard.
"Hey, what’s this all about? You’re
not thinking about violating the terms of our agreement, are you?"
"Oh! Don’t be such a shit!"
The flat of her fisted hand thumps the back of Fred’s ribs. "I just wanted
you to know how much I really do appreciate you’re help and company. Even
if I didn’t sleep with you."
"Sleep with you? Oh, yuck!
Disgusting!" Fred's face fart-wrinkles. "You mean, like kissing and and
everything? Oh, cooties, cooties!"
"Shut up, you jerk." Once again jabbing
Fred in the ribs Blade pushes herself away.
"Well, I do have one thing to say
to you my wonderfully multi-polar friend." Fred leans toward her. "Roselene."
"Oh shit!" Blade turns to dash out
into the corridor, fully expecting to find her daughter either missing
or engaged in some embarrassing mischief. Instead the girl stands in the
doorway watching them.
"Mommy, you just said a bad word."
The child chides.
"Daughter, you just corrected
your mother when she’s not in the mood for it. There’s a difference between
being right and being smart. Now mind your own business,
turn around, and march before we’re all late." This last part she directs
back at Fred, if for no other reason than to keep him in line. She hadn't
expected to hug him like that, and she doesn't want him to get any ideas.
Out in the usually quiet corridor
the commotion of pod-sep has grown to near insane. It seems to Roselene
that no matter how well grownups plan ahead they always seem to forget
the really important stuff until the very very end. And, it’s not just
the passengers. It looks like most of the crew is also bouncing around
as if both late and lost. Only after the lift's tall chrome doors slide
shut on the corridor's din does Roselene feel the least at ease. As the
ship’s inertial gravity begins to leave the girl's slender legs her abdominal
muscles gently tighten around her slowly floating stomach. Any more she
barely even notices the transition.
As the lift doors open Roselene finds
the same rush of people and baggage as down in the ship below, only this
time the commotion is compressed down into a considerably smaller space.
Having been through the cargo pod's loading ring several times during the
past few weeks on fieldtrips and with her mommy after work, this passage-ring
has become almost familiar to Roselene. Yesterday they were in here on
the way to see their new cabin. That is, if cabin is even the right word
to describe a tiny closet with a round door on the ceiling. Or on the floor.
It depends on how you look at it. You could even make the hatch be on a
little tiny wall at the end if you really wanted.
Stopping at a baggage hold Cousin
Fred stows their effects lockers without any of that "carry on your own
carry-on" nonsense like down at Edwards. And also unlike Edwards this passenger
list has been well established. No no-shows, no last minuet rejects. Locker
spaces are assigned in advance, giving Fred the opportunity to make some
arrangements with one of September's friends in Quartermasters. They had
three adjoining locker spaces reserved near the baggage hold's main airlock.
"So, where were we supposed to meet
John?" Dogging down the last latch Fred never even considers he's said
something stupid until he hears a small whimper escape Roselene.
"Fred!" Blade sounds more hurt than
angry. "I thought we had agreed to minimize anticipation time."
"Sorry." Reaching up Fred takes Roselene’s
slippered toe between his thumb and index finger and gently tug the tiny
girl's weightless mass down next to him. Tucking the sad-eyed child up
under his arm in a standard zero-g carry Fred gently holds her.
"What do you say we all go find our
Johnny Boy right now." Fred smiles down at the girl's sad pout. "You know,
I think I’m going to miss old Johnny almost as much as you. I mean, where
am I going to find another chess partner to beat? Why, I might even have
to teach you." His fingertip tickles down at the tip of her nose causing
Roselene's eyes to cross.
"Quit it, Cousin Fred." The child's
sudden sadness breaks just as suddenly. Then a small mischievous grin brightens
the girl's face as her quick mind pounces on fresh prey.
"Will you miss Cousin John as much
as you'll miss Ms Tem?"
"Ms Tem, is it? You little smarty-squeek."
Fred tickles a finger behind her ear.
"Come on, you two." Blade hurries
them on. "John said he’d meet us in the passenger ring near the separation
compartments. He’s probably there already."
"What do you say, Shorty? Want to
go it on your own, or fly piggy-back with me?" Fred knows the answer even
before asking.
"Piggy-back, I want to fly piggy-back!"
Roselene squeals.
"Fred, are you sure that’s safe with
all these people around?"
"Please, Mommy?" Roselene pleads.
"I’ll be extra careful, and
go slow." Fred promises. "It’ll be all right."
"Excuse me if I’m mistaken." Blade
sighs. "But, I thought the idea of flying a child piggy-back was so that
you could go faster."
"Oh, don’t go getting technical on
me now. I thought we were in a hurry."
"Yah, Mommy. Let’s go. I want to go
see Cousin John."
"You two go on ahead. I’ll stay back
here and monitor this flight. I don’t know which of you is more of a child."
Fred almost blurts out something stupidly
sarcastic about having just one more month to deal with his stupid childishness,
but as his mouth gapes opens a better sense takes hold and he quiets. Maybe
living with the girls this last year has been good for his people skills
after all. Quickly clipping his back-pack to the D-rings on his jumper's
chest Fred secures Roselene tightly to his back with a standard elastic
X-harness. Glancing around at the local activity for a safe flight path
Fred kicks out hard, dragging himself, Roselene, and two personal effects
lockers down into the cargo pod's loading ring.
As the three drift down through the
pod's central passageway Fred never allows nothing – human, baggage, or
structure – to get within two meters to Roselene. Blade has no doubt that
Fred possesses both the capability and inclination to transport her daughter
into the pod with perfect safely, but Blade is a mother. Where her
child is concerned, it’s Blade's job to obsess about even the improbable.
From her perch on Fred's back Roselene
wonders around at the swirling commotion drifting by. She and Fred have
often practiced piggy-back, but only in an empty passage-ring. This is
much more fun.
Gliding near the hollow torus' gray
padded wall Fred and Blade ricochet off, kicking themselves and their luggage
down into the long cylinder connecting the loading ring to the cargo pod's
passage-rings inside. Inside the passage ring's curved volume all manner
of people and baggage fly around in all directions. The confusion is so
wonderful that Blade has to tell Roselene twice to lay her head down against
Fred’s back.
After drifting down through the loading
ring's cross-flying chaos and finding a spot to grab hold, Fred unclasps
the X-harness and takes Roselene down off his shoulders. Before them the
pod's main hatch looms open. Over a hundred meters in diameter and fifteen
meters thick the massive opening makes the swarm tiny people drifting in
and out look like insects. And despite the commotion, Roselene seldom notices
anyone bump. Hanging suspended between her mother and cousin Roselene hears
a handtablet chime for a livelink.
"Where you at?" Fred asks down at
John’s flattened image. Roselene can tell he's somewhere inside this ring,
but she can’t seem to find him.
"We're thirty degrees to your starboard
and fifteen plus horizon. Over here next to the separation compartments."
"We?" Fred squints in vane out into
the human swirl.
"Yes, we!" September's voice says
from just out of view. Fred’s smile quickly widens as he thumbs off his
handtablet and slips it into its pouch.
"Come on, lover boy." Blade chides.
"Let’s go say good-by."
"Yes, let’s." Having somewhat sadistically
looked forward to watching John and Blade try to say their farewells in
front of a crowd, it now seems Fred will have to perform the same stunt
with September Lee.
For the glide across to the core Blade
insists that Roselene ride monkey-style; hugging Fred’s chest with her
head tucked up under his chin. This method is much safer than riding piggy-back,
but cumbersome for the adult and a rotten view for the child. Still, Roselene
enjoys floating across through the noise and bustle of the passage-ring
while safely tucked away next to Fred.
As they float toward the ring's interior
wall Roselene looks up past Fred’s cheek to find both John and Ms Tem anchored
near their separation compartment. At first Roselene doesn’t know who she
wants to hug first, but then launches herself straight at John.
"Hold on, little one. You’ll knock
me through the wall." John steadies himself as the small girl’s strong
thin arms nearly strangle him with their enthusiasm.
"I’m going to miss you, Cousin John.
I’m going to miss you a whole whole bunch."
"I’ll miss you to, Sweety." John whispers.
"Young lady, you have become my very most favorite little cousin in the
whole wide system. And should I ever make it down to Mars someday, you
are the very first person I’m going to go find." Fumbling through his pocket
John produces a shiny gold pin made of tiny octagonals surrounding the
concentric circles of a solar sailship. It seems to have been warn smooth
in places from years of polishing.
"The Captain asked me to give you
this. This is one of her very first sail-ship insignias. She’s kept the
set in her personal effects for over twenty Es. She says she wants you
to have one to commemorate the youngest Earthborn person to ever immigrate
out to Mars."
Roselene scratches a fingernail across
the pin's tiny raised ridges trying to know its feel. Then with a small
salute John presses the gold insignia to her jumper collar.
"I have something for you too, Ms
Rosie." September pulls herself around from behind John’s shoulder. "Do
you think you could take care of this for me?"
Ms Tem holds up a small double-walled
specimen wheel full of light colored granules and small crawling black
specks.
"One of the ant farms?" A sudden smile
lights Roselene’s face.
"With all the kids gone and no one
at the center to take care of them any more, I was afraid they might get
forgotten."
"Oh, Mommy! Can I?" Roselene
squeals.
"Well, I don’t know." Blade cocks
her head at the girl. Both women have discussed the matter at length and
decided that the ant farm represents the best possible distraction for
Roselene's trip down to Mars. First, ant farms have the advantage of being
alive. Puppies and kittens are not only scarce, but inconvenient as zero-g
pets. Ant farms are both convenient and clean. Second, this particular
ant farm is a continuing project from the Learning Center. Roselene has
been caring for and monitoring these ants and others like them in both
inertial gravity and zero-g for almost as long as she’s been aboard. It
carries continuity and connection. And third, and probably most important
to Blade, ants are a fundamental part of most engineered biospheres. Her
daughter’s future must be addressed, and biosphere engineering is not only
a very important field on Mars, but one that Blade herself understands.
"Will you promise to take care of
them and document their progress everyday just like you did in class?"
Her mother asks.
"Oh yes, Mommy. I promise! I’ll watch
them every day and feed them on schedule."
"And give me a weekly status report?"
Asks Ms Tem.
"Uh huh, every week." The girl’s tiny
head bobs up and down hard enough to throw John off balance "Can I, Mommy?
Please?"
Both John and Fred must fight to control
outright laughter. The two women have worked on this project for more than
a week. Trying to find the best type specimen container. Which volume?
Which variety of ant? And with which medium? The reverse-physiology overkill
seems ridiculously hilarious. Fred soon finds a short poked elbow to his
ribs, John a heel-knock to one shin.
"Well, okay then." Blade’s smile fairly
beams with motherly pride. "But, I’m going to hold you to your promise."
Taking the small ant farm from her daughter Blade glances back over her
shoulder.
"Fred?"
"Huh?" Fred grunts, suddenly surprised
to find himself included in the conversation. Blade unbuckle and remove
Roselene’s back-pack.
"Why don’t you and September take
our packs across the ring to our cabin?" Blade's practiced innocence speaks
of a subtle deviousness that Fred has come to fear. "You might as well
secure yours in there too until after separation."
A quick glance across at John shows
Fred a reflected look of confusion. Blade and September both seem knowing.
Sucker punched! Fred kicks
at himself internally. John’s brain sputters a short: Uhhhh…?
"Johnny Boy, your on your own." Helping
Blade off with her pack Fred slips it onto September as Blade secures Roselene’s
pack onto Fred’s chest harness.
"Hold still." Blade mumbles, uncharacteristically
avoiding Fred's eyes. With both packs secured September turns to Roselene
still clutched to John’s chest. Her arm out wide Roselene throws herself
around September's neck, but keeps her legs wrapped tightly around John.
"I’ll miss you, Little Miss Rosy.
I’ll miss you a lot." September makes no pretense at adult composure, blinking
away her tears as they rise.
"I’ll miss you too, Ms Tem."
"You be good, now. Okay?"
"I’ll be good. I promise." Roselene
tells September as she slowly pulls away.
"You two had better get going." Blade
hurries.
"If I don’t make it back, check the
airlocks." Fred jokes nervously.
"Come on, steerage." Grabbing hold
of Fred’s shoulder straps September kicks them both out away from the bulkhead.
For a moment Fred wobbles with surprise, but then rights himself against
September's mass as she moves to counter correct against him. The two reflect
across a near padded wall then slowly twist out through several arcs to
avoid the chamber's flying swarm.
"So, why didn’t you tell me that you
were going to be here last night at the party?" Fred asks in a moment of
relative unobstruction. "I thought you had duty or something?"
"Minimizing anticipation time." She
smiles back.
What are you up to, you little
brat?
"Anticipation of what?" Fred tries
in vane to sound and act in control as they twist around using each other's
mass. After team flipping their feet around down flight Fred and September
both land and grab anchor-straps near Blade’s cabin. With her anchor firmly
in hand September pulls herself over and quickly keys in the lock code.
With a yank she throws open the cabin's hatch. Before his voice even finds
breath to protest Fred discovers himself inside Blade’s cabin and the hatch
secured behind them.
"Fredy Boy." September begins. "It’s
no secret that I find your manic shyness quite charming. But sometimes,
dear friend, your shyness gets in the way." Both Blade’s back-pack and
September's jumper bounce lazily around the tiny cabin leaving a naked
September Lee pivoting to a slow stop. Small perfectly round breasts float
on September's slight frame in an almost doll-like parody of a woman. Her
smile shines at him as playful as sin.
"Are you nuts? I mean, I appreciate
it and all, but we don’t have time for something like this." Fred finds
himself both flattered and frightened as he listens to his mouth prattle
on. "Strap down is in less than an hour, and…!"
"Sweetheart." September grabs hold
of Fred's jumper pulling him near. "I have it on reasonable authority that
you haven’t been with anyone since coming aboard the Jib. If I don’t
get you post-orbital in under ten mikes you get double your money back.
Deal?"
"But, I…" Fred’s not quite sure how
it happened, but he finds himself stripped of both back-pack and jumper,
vaguely identifying his briefs as they drift away to be replaced by a moist
consuming warmth.
"But… I..." His throat convulses.
"But nothing." Completely
wrapped around her victim, September toe-nudges them both toward a bungie-tethered
sleep-net. "Hang on, sailor. We're heading for some severe delta-v."
"So, what do you think’s keeping Fred?"
John feels uncomfortably having to pull himself aside every time someone
passes.
"Maybe we should go find out."
Blade pivots herself out of her couch and is floating there next to John
before he even has time to think of protest. "Sweety, you stay here. Mommy
will be back in just a minute." Then turning with a hand on his shoulder
Blade whispers. "Maybe you should say good-by to her now."
"Time to yank off the Band Aid, huh?"
John asks, then feels suddenly sadder for the asking.
"Uh huh." Blade nods. "I’ll wait for
you back by the hatch." With a swimming kick Blade moves aside to let John
slide into her separation couch next to Roselene. Blade's lingering warmth
in the couch-pads distracts John as he looks down at the child. She seems
about to cry.
"I have to go now, Sweety. You
be very brave for me out there, and take care of your mother for me. Okay?"
"Why can’t you come down to Mars with
us?" Roselene fidgets against her crash restrains. "I know Mommy loves
you, and so does Cousin Fred."
"I, uh… huh. Out of the mouths of
babes." John chuckles sadly. Roselene doesn’t understand, but is too upset
to be inquisitive.
"Sweety, I love you more than any
other child circling Sol. And, if it were just up to me, I'd go down to
Mars with you in an instant. But, I’ve got this big ship to help fly. You
remember all the people it takes to help fly the Jib. If I’m not
here to help program communications, then little girls like you won’t be
able to get their daily post from their grandmas."
"Somebody else could do it." Roselene
counters, her lower lip fighting a losing tug-of-war.
"I’m sure someone else could. But,
I made a promise to Captain Movlinka and all the others onboard that I
would be their communications officer. And I have to finish the things
I start. Just like you." John tucks a finger under the girl’s chin trying
to coax up a smile. A weak acceptance is all she musters.
"Can I have a hug?" Roselene asks
shyly.
"Of course you can, Sweety." As he
pulls himself around toward her, Roselene hugs hard at John's neck. "And,
make it a good one, ‘cause this hug will to have to last me a long long
time."
"By-by, Cousin John. I love you."
With a peck on his cheek John pulls himself away.
"I love you too, Sweety." John presses
a kiss to her forehead then turns to leave while he still has vision to
navigate. Tears in zero-g are such a pain in the ass. They just hang there
blurring everything until you wipe them away. By the time John reaches
the compartment hatch he has both eyes blotted into his jumper selves.
But as he's about to exit the hatch a hand reaches out to stop him. Hanging
wedged between a removable storage locker and a compartment bulkhead Blade
smiles strangely as him.
"That was one of the most beautiful
things I’ve ever heard." She whispers.
"Eavesdropping again?" John smiles,
not at all offended.
"I left her tablet's audio-link open.
What kind of a mother do you think I am?"
"A snoopy one who loves her daughter."
"John, come here for a second. I need
to tell you something." Wedging her feet against bulkhead and locker Blade
pulls John into the gap so that his shoulder press tightly between them.
From the compartment passageway Blade disappears. Anyone passing by would
almost certainly know what was happening, but not exactly between whom.
With shy anticipation Blade places several small kisses on John's lower
lip, lighting a spark at his very core. Although not completely unanticipated,
the hunger in Blade's kiss hits him with unexpected force. And, as it’s
highly that unlikely he’ll ever see her again…
"I just wanted to tell you good-by."
She whispers. "And, let you know just how much I’ve appreciated you being
out here with us. You’ve made the journey out more than bearable. I can’t
imagine what it would have been like if you hadn't been onboard." Kissing
him again, this time with more passion, Blade's fingers clutch eagerly
at his jumper as she pulls her body even closer into his, her legs wrapped
tightly around his thigh as she presses herself hard against his leg's
tightening muscle.
"Blade, I appreciate this, believe
me, you have no idea just how much, but, uh… I wouldn’t want to upset Fred.
He’s still very fond of you, you know." An somewhat shy grin splits John’s
still boyish face. "Almost as fond as I am."
"I wouldn’t worry myself about Fred
finding us and being upset." Blade whispers, her face pressed warm against
John's neck, the scent of her hair intoxicating him. "Fredy's got a lot
more trouble on his hands right now than you do."