1 Aug 95

It's easy to understand how physical laws keep things in their respective places. Similarly, there are spiritual laws that do the same in a different domain. Yet the result is the same, a predestination from which we cannot escape. But, what about chaos, the stuff that provides the uncertainty factor that keeps science on it's toes? Is there the equivalent is a metaphysical or spiritual chaos wherein free will might make it's appearance? Perhaps, but I don't have a clue about chaos as science sees it.

The song from Pocahontas, Colors of the Wind, by Vanessa Williams was the number 1 song on the Adult Contemporary chart once again. It's a beautiful song, with a wonderful melody, but the words are difficult to remember. One of the things that I find most interesting is that the Disney songs are coming through with deep spiritual messages. For instance, in this particular song their is a line "you think that you can own the land you land on". The way that it is stated makes it obvious that this is not the case -- which brings up the whole issue of property ownership and property rights. These are things that we've taken for granted for a long time. From an ecology standpoint, another couple lines "How high does a sycamore grow? If you cut it down, how will you even know?" Also, "every rock and tree and creature has a life, has a spirit, has a name." These are deep metaphysical pronouncements being heard be millions of people in this country multiple times. And, this is just one popular song. Earlier this year, Elton John had two different songs from The Lion King that hit the top of the charts as well and stayed there for many weeks. One dealt specifically with the "Circle of Life" and the idea that "one should never take more than one gives." It also expresses the guiding principles of several major spiritual paths before it come to this final principal. As I recall, the other song was called "I Believe in Love." It's still in the top 10 after spending 6-8 weeks at #1 and then working it's way down slowly. That such songs have gained such prominance indicates that the tide has turned and revolution is close at hand. It's as if the mass consciousness is being prepared for something. Yet, most are unaware that they are indeed being programmed. Programmed for what? The bottom line is for living life in community and service. The ME generation is about to become the WE generation. The resulting change will send a shock wave round the world. The changes to come are mind blowing, truly beyond imagination. And, they are extremely close at hand. Interesting.

ME = 135 = 1:57(78) = 1:52(83) = 1:51(84) = 1:47(88) WE = 235 = 3:01(78) = 2:69(83) = 2:67(84) = 2:59(88)

The difference between the two is exactly 100 = 1:22(78) = 1:16(84) = 1:12(88). That WE is 3:01, the first year of The Empress cycle. Interesting. WE are also my first two initials and their sum total 23 + 5 = 28, The Man with the World in His Hand.

So, when is 1776 + 228? That would be the year 2004, one year before the year my birthday falls on Easter Sunday. Curious. There is a shiver running down my spine again. I know that there is something wonderous that must be in place by that time. Exactly what, I do not know, but the shiver is a sure sign that something of great importance will occur. It will be interesting to see just what that is. I sense that we're coming on a time when it is necessary for my VISION to grow that I may pass on what I see and experience to others. As if the changes weren't happening fast enough already. It seems that everything is up in the air -- a house for sale, work that basically ends in 8 months, weekly if not daily changes on the consciousness front. And here I sit in peaceful bliss knowing that everything is already complete and decided. I only need await its enactment and what will be will be exactly what is needed at the time. Consciousness operates out of perfection. Everything happens in accord with spiritual law. And, spiritual law says that consciousness creates reality. A minor point often neglected is that this truth applies to the Higher Self not the conscious one that is currently experiencing life here on Earth.

652 = 8:36(77) = 8:28(78) = 7:64(84) = 7:36(88) = 7:29(89) = 7:15(91)

652 = 2 x 326 = 2 x 2 x 163 That's as far as she goes. 163 is prime. But what happens when we reverse things to get a spiritual perspective. 256 = The High Priestess : Balance/Justice. However 256 also = 16 x 16 = The Tower squared. Now isn't that a kick. That also explains why the number would have such meaning to me. Further this is 2 to the 8th, a glorified way of expressing 28:The Man with the World in His Hand.

2 Aug 95

On the way into work I noticed that the Scitor building just around the corner from my work near the Versatel machine has address 256. How's that for coincidence. It's as if everything in my world has meaning, but there is a time for that meaning to be revealed. It doesn't come be searching intently for it. In fact, at times it seems that the more effort one expends, the further from the truth one gets. It's curious that this would be so, but such it is.

Talked to Tom F. a bit about Determinism vs Free Will. It's a classic philosophical and religious issue that lies completely within the realm of belief. There is nothing objective to prove the case one way or another. Further, there is nothing subjective that has been convincing. Actually, it only matters to the few people who have thought deeply enough for this to become an issue in their personal lives. Here is where I stand now. Ready and willing to face and embrace the unknown with open arms. For, there is truly now other way to live that makes sense. Consciously, I know of nothing that I truly control. Nothing. At another time that would have been frightening. Now, it is a simple statement of fact, subjective though it may be.

Such is the reality that I live within. I believe this to be the case for others as well, only they lack the awareness that this is so. Yes, it is very audacious of me to speak in this manner, especially given my predisposition to The Hermit nature and avoidance of people. Yet, I speak from my heart in the only way that I know how. Consciousness fills my head with the energies that get translated into these words. It is to her that I bow, not to any mortal being. Though, this same consciousness within me is within all others as well. To that spirit, I bow, when I use the term Namaste. Interesting that this would be so, ONE consciousness at the center of all existence. Yet, I still experience myself as an individual, as separated from others most of the time. However, on a few occasions their have been moments of much greater awareness of a Self that encompasses more than time and space and stretches into the very hand of God, or bosom of consciousness herself. I remember two such times distinctly, highly manic times, but times when I knew that I was Buddha and I was GOD. I was completely convinced, without any doubts to the contrary. Even now, two years later, these events are vivid in my recall.

What is there about reality that makes us believe that our personal experience is true for others and in particular is the norm, or true for most others. I know that my experience of the world does not fit this mold. Checking serial number of money, license plate numbers, addresses, balances of bills, and various other numbers using semi-mathematical methods does not constitute logical thinking. This is clearly not where most people look to find meaning in their world. But, it is where I look. First, because I am compelled to do so as if by an irresistable force. Second, because it is incredible how often such methods reveal important meaning not only for my life but for the world at large. The musings of a crazy man? So long as I can keep the presense of mind to continue asking that question, there is some hope that my sanity is still in tack. Though, at this point, it matters not to me whether it is or not. I know that the connection with source consciousness is firmly established. With this linkup, my role in the Play is set, my destiny will be fulfilled that the larger objectives of consciousness may be achieved. Do I live my life or do I watch my life being unveiled before me? Am I consciousness, or am I physical, or in some way am I both? Interesting questions. However, the answer is obvious -- I am consciousness expressing through physical form in this space/time continuum. I will express so long as I have something to express or something to learn and then I will go back to being consciousness planning it's future expression in space and time. The major issue is awareness and how to extend awareness as far as possible in this existence, for the degree of awareness directly impacts the degree to which consciousness can express within the physical. --- A bit of a break in which to do the work for which I am paid. But now, it's my time and I can do the work which I most love to do. Service to consciousness. That's probably as close of a descriptor as I can apply at this time. How that will transform in the days, months, and years ahead remains to be seen. However, my sense is that the truth will be far stranger than any fiction. The words from my Valedictorian address come to mind "The time has come for a revolution, an intellectual revolt against present trends of thinking and being." It's especially interesting because I recall something recent that dealt with dramatically changing out way's of thinking and being. It struck me at the time that those specific words were used. It's also interesting that this would happen 19 years after I spoke them, though I know that even then, I was but a spokesman for a deeper source within me or which I was yet consciously unaware, even though the intuition was sufficiently developed to allow the information to come forth and to move me to speak in the manner that I did.

However, then as now, I felt misunderstood, or unheard. I speak/scribe through these notes and pass them out to a few people, but there is little to no feedback from anyone on anything. It's almost as if I'm speaking a foreign language. Perhaps that is more true than even I know. For words to convey a meaning, there must be a basis or framework for understanding. In this case, I barely understand what is being written, and it is coming through me. How can I expect others to do the same, especially if they come from different spiritual and metaphysical backgrounds.

The bottom line is that spirit occupies the prominent place in my life. It always has and always will. Everything else pales in comparison. Obviously, there are many for which this is not true. In fact, there are few for which it is true, and extremely few for which it is so true. Of course, I would naturally gravitate in this manner given my makeup.

I speak a lot from the first person. For the most part, that is all I really know. My experience with relationships with others -- even casual relationships is virtually non-existent. Do I choose to make it that way? Not as far as I can tell. However, I know what I've experienced, and that includes very limited involvement with people. Oh, I've been married nearly 8 years, but I have no sense that my wife knows me. My observation is that she thinks that she does. However, the vast majority of what I AM is on the inside and most of it is not expressed in the outside world at all. These notes provide an in-depth picture that is as intimate as I am able to express at this particular time. Yes, it comes across as Ego-centric. I obviously have a high opinion of myself and of my mission on the planet in this existence. At the same time, I know that I come from a position of being without desire for any sort of earthly success. Spirit drives my thoughts and my actions. I have no goals, no dreams, no desires [well, maybe a few desires still]. I am a confirmed fatalist, thoroughly convinced that we are experiencing a Play designed in detail by our Higher Selfs in conjunction with consciousness. As we experience life, determinism reigns and free will is non-existent. Our free will was exercised when the Play was co-created. Now, we are stuck with living with the challenges and script that we planned for ourselves.

How can I believe this. Freedom, liberty, and free will are basic foundational principles in this country, are they not? The bottom line is that their position as foundational principles doesn't make them any more true. I've spent a lot of time thinking about this, and reviewing what I have experienced and observed in my life. I have yet to find anything that leads me away from the above beliefs in any manner. Now, these beliefs are relatively new to me. It's only the dramatic awakenings I've been through in the past two years that have led me not only to speculate that this is a possibility, but to thoroughly believe that it is so.

The key question is what difference does it make? At 37, I have never voted, primarily because I felt that it literally made no difference what government did or who occupied what positions. My focus was spirit, and government by its own rules had separated itself from church/spirit. I've never been a planner. I look out for the immediate future and do things like make appropriate maneuvers to position myself to smoothly do things. However, this is an automatic process that just happens for me. I've noticed others to be more absent-minded when driving. For the most part, I don't do anything in my life that requires planning at all. Occasionally, my schedule is impacted by a work commitment or by a social commitment that my wife makes. Knowing that whatever will be will be, is a very freeing thing for consciousness. I don't have to worry about anything. My Higher Self and consciousness have taken care of everything and are feeding me exactly what is needed to carry out my part at any time. Further, my part is not to take actions. These just happen. I observe them, and then take the next step of trying to understand what thy mean and what I'm supposed to learn from them. This doesn't mean that I'm not responsible for what happens. Quite the contrary. I accept that my Higher Self chose everything I experience, and that I consciously will see spiritual law operating in full. However, I don't believe that I can consciously choose what I think or what I do. There is no contradiction, I will reap what I see myself sow, but I am consciousness watching it all happen, I am not a limited self locked inside a body. So, the bottom line is not what happens -- that can be exactly the same whether free will or determinism operates. The difference is in the awareness. Free will requires conscious responsibility. Determinism says that we are spiritually responsible, but that our conscious is in the process of growing in awareness through experience in the world. There is this fundamental idea that we are souls first : sparks of the ONE consciousness existing primarily outside of the context of this space/time continuum. We create incarnations to provide opportunity to learn and grow. It appears that restriction is necessary to focus the self enough for specific lessons to be learned.

Now, however, it seems that we are at the crossroads of a massive change. Everything that comes to my attention seems to confirm this same general message. Spirit is engaging the masses in ways that are subtle yet extremely powerful. Overall Government seems to be moving in a direction opposite of Justice Exalted. However, the sense is that this is a temporary move that will prompt a violent reaction that forces things in the other direction.

It is not clear how the economy will comply. The market continues to rise, as do corporate profits, with the end result that less money reaches the workers and more reaches the owners. This can't go on. Distribution of wealth is a big deal and society should decide how this is done, not just the owners of the big companies. There is a very real sense that we have a few wealthy owners and a lot of slaves in this country. Yes, I would consider most workers to be slaves of their jobs. Their lifestyles require them to indenture a good part of them time in doing things that others demand of them. Oh, the work environments vary dramatically from enlightened to moderate to draconian -- with most in the middle but more in the later than the former.

Who am I to speak in this manner? How can I know that what comes through in these notes is right? The fact is that I am whom I say I am, Wayne Ellis Hartman, Jr. I speak in this manner from whom that I am. I make no claim to conscious knowledge of what will come through. As I've said many time, consciously I do not know how these words get into my head. I don't belief they come from random or non-random processes within the brain. My explanation is that consciousness is the source of thought and she resides outside of space and time. Further, all thought for all individuals originates from the same ONE consciousness. In a very real way, we are ONE and have never been otherwise. However, our experience is that we are individuals. Most of us have no awareness of an inner connection at all. Even fewer have a strongly developed intuition of which they are consciously aware. As to whether any of this is right, I cannot judge that for anyone else. Clearly, I have no intent nor motivation to deceive, for in doing so I am impacted more than anyone else. My very life hangs on these words. If you do not sense that the truth in what is being conveyed is obvious, move on or put the works aside. Trust your own intuition to guide you to what is true for your unique path. Much of what I do is mark the territory of consciousness itself. It is one of the few uncharted territories. Oh, there have be a few who have found ways to journey here and there. However, it is time for a much more thorough and disciplined exploration. And, it truly is an exploration. I am constantly amazed by what I find. Further, I am amazed that so little of what I have read applies to what I am experiencing as reality.

Enough for those two questions. Pathfinder and Trailblazer come to mind as job titles. Bringer of the New Way is another. I'm curious about the timing for what lies ahead. It's one thing to be a fatalist in theory. It's quite another to be a fatalist. I've observed that there are a lot of ways of speaking that are counter to this viewpoint that were a strong part of my mental makeup for 36 years. These are dropping as I notice them, but they did not suddenly depart from the thoughts that now come into my mind. Just as I see corrections in typing made on the fly, at another level I'm seeing corrections in how thoughts are phrased. Further, these are not small things. They are major changes that strongly impact how I see the world and the very nature of reality and consciousness herself. For one thing, whenever there is an apparent choice in my life or another's that I am aware of, it is interesting to see what course of action takes place and what if any conscious justification is made for the seeming choice.

There is still a sense that I'm hanging by a thread in some manner, or walking on a very narrow path. My trust in consciousness, however, is unshakeable. I know that I am being moved toward a destiny that I chose at a Higher Self level. There is no possibility of failure. The task for which I came must be completed. The Dawn must indeed arrive, and the mass consciousness must be educated for what is to unfold. It all comes back to Beyond Imagination and my role in bringing forth the VISION of what is to be and then assuring that the Vision is implemented in a manner that is consistent with Justice Exalted.

Further, my sense now is that my whole life to date has prepared me for what I am about to do. As of yet, I know not what that is. However, by all indications that I can read, next year is the year that it all starts -- at least at the public level. This does not mean my days as The Hermit are over. It only means that other parts of my character may need to be expressed as well. It's interesting that 1996 comes through via Astrology, and several ways via Numerology. The fact that the 38 Tarot card corresponds to Vision provides further confirmation. Then, on the work side, my present job ends at the end of Mar 96. It's curious that all these factors point to the opportunity and necessity for change, and to the possible character of that change. Specifically how this will work itself out will be unveiled over time. Consciousness seems to offer information on a need to know basis in my life. For the past two years, it has been important to learn new symbolic vocabularies that allow me to see and hear the spiritual world that is present all around us. Much of what I've learned and how I learned it is documented in these notes. In many cases, I've included raw information along with my interpretations. For the most part, I've captured everything I noticed. One strong conclusion out of all of this is that there is indeed a spiritually world expressed in the ordinary symbols that surround us. However, one can only get to the specific information applicable to the individual via the intuition. One must allow spirit or consciousness to guide one's attention to what symbols are meaningful NOW, and then to interpret the relevant meaning.

I write and write and write. Even when it seems that there can be nothing further to say, consciousness still comes through. The depth of what is expressed varies dramatically over time. Also, the apparent source can appear different. But, it all comes through me, through my head and through the fingers that I observe moving over the keyboard even as I await the letters to appear on the screen and even as at a higher level I hear and interpret what is being said. I've noted that activity is taking place at all these level simultaneously before. Further, I've noted that much of this activity happens automatically. I have no conscious awareness of how they are taking place when they are taking place. Oh, in some cases there are theories about how some of this happens, but nowhere have I read or been taught about how these activities occur. I consider myself highly educated, MSEE from Stanford and 20 years of Metaphysics. Yet, I have no clue other than to offer the theory that it's all done automatically and that thoughts originate from this non-physical entity that I call the ONE consciousness.

From this perspective, I don't choose how these words come out or even what thoughts will be expressed or even whether I will sit here and allow this to occur nor for how long. This is determined by the Plan which is outside of my conscious awareness. I don't know whether I'll write for 10 minutes or for 10 hours, whether I'll stop at 11:30PM or 1:25 AM. My wife says this is a cop out. She still believes in free will and choice. But, I have no sense that I can stop or control anything. What happens, happens. Though, part of my behavior, especially work behavior generally follows norms acceptable to those I work with and/or for.

More and more, I'm reaching a point of awareness where I question virtually everything. The sense is that I am ready (in awareness) for all key beliefs to be examined, and eliminated and replaced if found wanting. This is already occuring. Consciously I'm observing it happen. I don't have any sense that I am making it happen. My Ego doesn't seem to mind not having control anymore. It seems resigned to the fact that this entity called "consciousness" provides all control. And, from what it has seen, it has learned that consciousness is competent and can be trusted.

3 Aug 95

If the first two days are any indication of what is to come, we're in for a doozie of a month from a notes standpoint. It's hard to believe this is only the start of the third day. But then, I've seen the fires go from red hot to cold embers literally overnight, so there is no utility in projecting what might be. I'm more and more receptive to providing the time for consciousness to come through. Or, at least, I observe that I seem to be. 8:55 = HEW, my initials backward. It's interesting to see what times my attention is drawn to observe and take note of. Also, the writing pace seems to be a bit faster than it used to be. It's as if the channel is more open and willing to bring the information though, whatever it might be. Also, I do not appear to be in control of when I can write and when I cannot. I write when I am moved to do so, trusting that consciousness will not abuse the situation, and that I am performing my role in accord with the Play. Further, my sense is that I am working whether writing these notes or writing related to the Loral projects that I'm assigned. In the present worldview however, only the later counts as "real" work. The former is my personal stuff. Yet, in many cases the former is far from personal and moreover is the more important of the two though no specific jobs may be called to address it. Interesting. The sense is that I am doing work that will ultimately lead to the spiritual transformation of the country and the world, impacting hundreds of millions if not billions before it is over. All that I ask in return is that my needs continue to be met, and that the circumstances be optimized where possible for the performance of my mission. I don't believe that is asking much. My needs are not great by any means, especially given the task for which I am literally willing to give my life in service to perform. Not that I have anything to give at this point. That choice was made prior to coming here. However, my conscious awareness of the task and the choices made with respect to it are growing daily, indicating to me that the time is close at hand for beginning it's fulfillment. Interesting.

I wonder how many others feel this way. It is as if I am virtually independent of the world of Illusion, no longer subject to its trap and it's laws. I am aware, and further, am aware that I am aware, on up for several levels. I have no experience that shows others to be in this conscious state. I don't doubt that there are others. However, my Hermit status limits my exposure. My sense us that it was necessary for me to discover all that I have on my own, guided by consciousness herself every step of the way; and not through the physical interaction with others. I can only believe that what I have experienced is what I was meant to experience and needed to experience for my personal growth.

Looking back, however, there were a lot of boring years overall. Things really starting picking up around the time I met my future wife. It only took 100 days to go from meeting for the first time to getting married and the 18 year age difference had no importance. In many ways, Gini seemed younger than I am. There was a certainty that this was right spiritually. And then, as now, the time was ripe for change. For many years I've had a sense that "Ancient One" is an appropriate term for me. There is an immediate recognition of Wisdom that comes from experiences that clearly have not occurred in this existence. My observations are that most people don't have this sense, or if they do, they haven't developed it.

9:28 = The Hermit : The Man with the World in His Hands. In many ways, this seems to describe what I am. 5:28 comes up often as well, replacing the Hermit with The Hierophant. Then the is also 7:56 = 428 which replaces The Hierophant with The Emperor. It's curious that 9 = 4 + 5. The Hermit = The Emperor + The Hierophant [Hmm. Philosopher King or Spiritual King] 9 also = 3 + 3 + 3 = The Empress x 3 and 3 + 6 = The Empress + The Lovers.

ASLAN => AS(H)LAN(D) adds 12 to 47 to reach 59. No wonder I keep seeing the 59 card as the Aquarian Age card, even though the picture it carries is far from positive. It's also curious that HD = 84 as if I'm the missing piece that turns America into ASHLAND that the PHOENIX may indeed arise out of the ashes and a new world may be born.

7 Aug 95

I don't believe in chance encounters. And perhaps, the way this material is to get out is from person to person as consciousness dictates the appropriate connections and circumstances.

Three days without writing. It seems like an eternity. Further, the page rate dropped from 4 per day which is a near record pace down to 2 per day which is respectable none-the-less. Besides, there is nothing to keep it from picking up again, should consciousness be willing and I be able. This continuating communication happens to an audience unseen. Oh, I constitute an audience of one, bearing witness to what consciousness expresses. However, there is a strong sense that this is meant for a much wider audience than my own consciousness. Then again, there may be a bit of ego slipping through. However, I claim no conscious awareness of how this message is created. It is obvious that it comes through me. But, there is nothing obvious within me that says it is of me. Through me is far different than of me. In the first, my role is that of scribe and translator (not an insignificant role for what is being expressed). In the second, my role is that of creator, and this I have not felt to be true throughout the over two years that these notes have been coming through.

I don't know how many times this point have been made, in slightly different ways here and there, but it is definitely repeated often enough, that my awareness is cognizant of it always. I know not how nor from where these ideas come. I consider myself but a scribe, and consider the source to be consciousness herself, a non-physical entity akin to Goddess, The Empress. Further, I believe this source to be the ONE, so that the same consciousness driving my thoughts drives the thoughts of all others as well. Further, because of this, everything is perfectly coordinated, things occur exactly as they are planned, with the one exception being our own personal realization and awareness. This is one area that can be coaxed a bit, but cannot be pushed. Yet, there is a large wave coming. And, those ready to ride that wave into a New Age will experience a grand reality indeed where spirit is able to soar as never before on this planet and flesh. I came to help usher in that new day, to allow the Dawn of a New Age to finally manifest. Though, I'm not sure that my help is truly required. It seems that the New Age will arrive regardless of the specific consciousness level. However, the is also a sense that the greater the awareness, the greater the glory of the Dawn.

9:28 PM. The Hermit : The Man w/ The World in His Hands : The Benefactor. It's about time that I get back to note writing. I'm in a strange state of mind, neither up nor down, but somewhat dazed. I don't know why, but there is a fuzziness that is noticeable. Too much sun over the weekend didn't help. I can still feel it burning, primarily on the shoulders but partially on the face, especially around the forehead. However, it doesn't seem that should make all that much difference. Made copies of the Beyond Imagination briefings and notes for the past couple months. Why? Good question. It just felt like the right thing to do. Generally that means it will be time to distribute the information shortly. I probably convey a sense that in many ways I am not in control of my own life. That is a correct assessment. I neither sense that I am in control, nor do I desire to be such. Consciousness has charge of my life now. Thus far I have found it useful to place my trust in her arms completely. Quite interesting that this would be the case, but it is. With the exception of spiders, snakes, and other strange insects -- most of my fears have been eliminated. That does not mean that I am fearless, only that fear is not a major controlling factor in my life. It's also interesting to watch how my life is unfolding. Change is all about me. I expect that looking back from my 38th birthday I will find that the events of the next 8th months will have been very interesting, indeed. There is an inner sense that the transformation will be complete, but in a way that is quite unexpected. I look forward with excited anticipation. At the same time, I know that the way to get there is moment by moment until the time has indeed arrived. The moment is where life is lived. It is the only time when consciousness can express. One might even say it is the only time that is timeless, just as Here is the only place without location. "Be Here Now", I believe that came from Ram Dass, however I would be surprised if he didn't get it from Eastern spiritual teachings. This is the key to getting Beyond Mind as Krishnamurti talked about and tried to teach for much of his life.

I can tell that the channel is sluggish tonight. Usually, there is more of a crispness associated with the material coming through. Last week, I was literally writing as fast as my fingers could move. Now, however, it's as if I'm not fully here. Not because I am flying, but because I am somewhat numb. I'm not used to feeling this way, especially since I've been flying for nearly too months. So, where do we go next? What would consciousness express? In copying the briefings the came through in January, I realized that they contain a lot of good ideas. I knew this before, but it really sunk in that these briefings prescribe a formula for truly building a viable community with a proper government, economy, and education system. The briefings call for bold steps. Somehow, however, the steps described are a VISION of what is to be. I have no idea of how we as a country will get there, but the higher level course of action is clear. I remember the sense I had as I generated the briefings: this is the truth as best I can express it at this time. Interesting. But, the certainty that this was what was required from the highest level to address the key problems of the day was complete. The next question is: will it happen as I captured it? And what part, if any, will I have to play in the execution?

The idea that it is time to scrap the US Constitution and build a new one that can take us into a new millennia would probably be considered to be high treason by the majority in this country. Yet, we have a current situation where a document with a set of ten initial Amendments and another couple dozen Amendments made over time has served a nation for over 200 years to a time where the nature and complexities of life are far different and greater than the Founding Fathers could every had imagined. It is absurd that we haven't taken action sooner to build a government more capable of serving us in the modern world. For the most part, our government is considered to be a joke. Dishonesty is rampant in politics. PACs literally direct votes on legislation based on which candidates they fund -- and, of course, they do so for the good of their company, industry, or special interest rather than the public interest. Yet, it goes on and on and on. It's time to say enough is enough -- and, not just to the politicians, but to the PACs and more importantly, to the companies they support. As a society, we need to empower ourselves and say this is how we chose to live. Companies, if you want to sell your goods in our market, this is the share of profit you are entitled to for your investment and the rest goes back to the public good in whatever way society finds best. Why we allow individuals or companies to accrue undue wealth is ridiculous. It basically says that companies can rip us off and charge us more than the value they provide. The argument generally given is that "free enterprise" will keep this from happening. However, Tucker was a classic case. He proved that the public was paying way too much for way too little in a car. Yet, he was denied the ability to get his cars to full scale production, even though he achieved his dream and made 50 of his cars.

The problem that we face here is how do we as a society make decisions that impact us all? Here is where majority rule is not the answer. Our government was not designed simply to express the rule of the majority. Rather, it was designed to protect minorities. My sense of things is that people should rise to the positions for which they are most qualified and not go beyond that to where the Peter Principle takes effect. Our current means of identifying candidates and funding them has no checks that assure the candidates do indeed have the skills and abilities to do the job.

There is a sense that things can't change until the prerequisite ideas are broadcast and incorporated into belief systems -- and in particular, the incorporated into the mass consciousness. Interesting. Here is where the domain of awareness comes in. It fits atop the actions and events that occur in the world. Belief systems are used to translate these events into meaning. They are tools that are available to consciousness to assist in understanding it's world as a reflection of the nature of itself. Now, that was deep. I've seen it expressed in different ways, but this is the first time it's really struct me in this way. I'm starting to see where free will fits in. It is here, at the level of reality interpretation; and in how we become aware of our Selfs, our own Higher Consciousness, and the ONE Consciousness herself.

ONE = O Ne = 8 10 = 18 = The Moon. Now, isn't that interesting. How appropriate that a lunatic would be in search of The ONE. Appropriate, indeed.

ONE = 15 + 14 + 5 = 34. This is spirit wandering and being planted as ideas. Another interpretation that matches what I've been doing.

One = 15 + 5 + 5 = 25 = First Knight, added association with 30 = Camelot. This also has a direct connection with my 2 soul ray, 5 personality ray.

one = 6 + 5 + 5 = 16 = The Tower. That's interesting as well. We're on Pg 16 now. This is the number that most characterizes my purpose.

It's also curious that O Ne + one = ONE.

The question of how to get the Beyond Imagination ideas out to their intended audience is at the forefront of my mind. I can't stop feeling that there is something that I am supposed to do, some connection I am supposed to make. Yet, I know that my actions are predestined, and as such occur without my conscious direction/choice. Then again, my conscious is a tool, just as every other part of my mind and body; and, as such, should be available at the beck and call of consciousness to do whatever work consciousness would have me do. Am I reaching a stage where I can consciously co-create reality in line with the direction of spirit? It sure seems that the utility factor for expressing spirit in flesh is much greater if I can apply all of whom that I am aware that I am in flesh, and this includes my conscious mind.

8 Aug 95

8/8 is a very special day. These only occur 12 times per year. This one is especially interesting because 8 + 8 = 16:The Tower. Further 88 = Completion. No other double has this relationship. 11/11 and 12/12 have great power too, however for very different reasons.

Time to continue with the notes for a bit. It's always good to start off my day with a few monitions of consciousness. What they will be, I never know. Yet, I can trust that consciousness always has something useful or important to say. It's an interesting process, using one's own connection with source as the primary source of information for gaining Self-Awareness. This was not taught in any school or workshop that I have attended or any book that I have read, as far as I know. Why, escapes me. Now, this is by far the most important on-going process in my life. That it took 35 years to find it was amazing. However, many never find it after a lifetime or searching, and many more don't bother to even search at all. To each, their own. Their is a sense that at any given moment, the world is perfect in accord with the awareness of each individual and the resulting collective awareness of the whole. How can this be given that there is so much violence and crime, and so few examples of the Power of Love in day to day life? Regardless of appearances, such is indeed the case. Experience in the world, and experience for spirit, while related, are very different things. Spirit is subtle. It does not force its way or desires upon the world. It gives completely of itself wherever it is needed and called. It is primarily called by awakenings of awareness. These come about through timing in special cases and through the appropriate self-work and observation in general.

Yes, it's obvious by now that I consider myself to be a special case, and that the timing of my awakening was literally written in the stars. It could have been predicted from my birth but was not. In fact, the astrologers only confirmed that what I was experiencing exactly two years ago was due to a particular energy pattern that lasted for over three months. Neptune conjunct Uranus (nearly exact) both square to my Natal Sun (nearly exact as well). It's strange recalling this now. That was a very important, but very weird time in my life. My mind was functioning in strange ways, accepting things as true, with very little if any verification. My belief system effectively went out on a limb -- and a very weak limb at that; and, ultimately the very foundations of what I had believed before were taken away before my very eyes, only in this case spiritual rather than physical eyes.

Since then, the change has been constant. There is hardly a day in which I can look back and say I had not learned some new truth, especially spiritual truth. My life is lived where my focus is. It should be obvious by now that spirit and consciousness are the motivating factors in my life. They drive me, and define my very being. I would not have it any other way. Such is necessary to carry out the mission that I came to perform. I have glimpses of what this is, but no overall picture, and no real details. Yet, I trust in this destiny to the utmost, and I know that consciousness guides me every step of the way.

I find it interesting that I can place so much trust and faith in this non-physical entity that I call consciousness. Yet, to me, it seems such a natural thing to do that I cannot imagine living in any other way. Also, I have a lot of experience with consciousness coming through, so the trust and faith now has a very strong foundation. The bottom line appears to be trust in the validity of inner reality vs the outer illusion. The outer offers a reflection of the inner, however, so it has great utility as well. We are spiritual beings experiencing physical reality, not the other way around. It's time we recognized that fully and did what it takes to bring more of that spiritual nature into the physical experience by becoming true temples for spirit through which consciousness can do her works.

9 Aug 95

File size = 755 38 = 528 VISION. Interesting. Futher, I started typing at 11:00, Justice:The Fool. Today marks the 50th anniversary of dropping the A-Bomb [Fat Man] on Nagasaki. I found it curious that Nagasaki wasn't even the primary target and is arranged geographically much like San Francisco, so the blast was only felt in a section of the city. Interestingly, the Catholic section. Something as simple as weather causing cloud cover over the primary target led to the devastation and horror at Nagasaki, though the fatality count was only half that of the preceeding disaster at Hiroshima. Whereas Hiroshima has become a shrine to Peace, Nagasaki was forced to get on with its life as a sort of lesser cousin. Interesting.

Now, what did this have to show to consciousness? What was the war about? Power and conquest. Wielding one's might to wherever one could. Where is the morality in this position? What makes it right for one people or nation to decide that another people are inferior and hence can be treated as subhuman? Further, to take this to an extreme and believe that it is righteous to exterminate such a people is about as heinous of a crime as can be committed. Yet, such is the power of Hate inflamed. It allowed the Turks to exterminate the Armenians near the turn of the century and Hitler's Greater Germany to exterminate so many Jews in the late 30's through 1945. And, now in what was Yugoslavia, we see three groups at odds with each other for centuries committing atrocities on a daily basis and there appears to be nothing effective that the United Nations or the United States can do. Yet, the answer is simple. No, it is not to allow people to settle their own disputes as they would please. Rather, it is to realize that we live in a world that has closed in on itself, so that the affairs of each nation are intertwined with all others. In such a world, particular types of behavior are simply no longer acceptable, period. They will neither be allowed nor tolerated, and any companies or individuals caught supporting or funding these behaviors will have their possessions confiscated and will be subjected to strict punishment under international law. The nations and individuals participating in such conflicts will be subjected to the appropriate sanctions necessary to stop their conflict and bring their differences up before impartial mediation with the goal of coming up with a WIN-WIN scenario.

Interesting. How can this be so obvious to me and not to others? Then again, maybe it is obvious to others as well. However, there is obviously a minority of individuals [the 5,000] who prefer to keep the status quo, maintaining the power balance exactly where it is. Yet, this is truly unacceptable to the very concept of the Aquarian Age. Though, from a quick look at the awareness level of the masses, it is not clear whether Self-government has yet arrived. It may still be necessary for a small group [the 5,000] to make the changes necessary to transform the society. It's much easier organizing things from the top down. OK, so how do I get tapped into such a group in a manner that provides credibility. I have no inherited wealth. Ah, but that is not quite right, I would not give up my spiritual inheritance for any price. So, will I just be recognized for WHOM that I AM? My sense is that yes, indeed, when the time is right my ideas and VISION will be recognized -- and then, my personal recognition will follow.

When doesn't matter. Consciousness guides me every step of the way. The Play calls for the appropriate generation, dissemination, receipt, and understanding or the information that is to go forth from me into the world. With Mercury at the top of my chart, there is no doubt that communication plays a major role in why I am here, and thus where many of my natural abilities lie. The sense is that the process was all designed specifically to give me the capabilities needed and the programming required to carry out my destiny at the designated time, a time as of yet which I know not. Oh, I have some general hints that have come through in the past two years, some much louder than others. However, these all speak of future times, when what confronts me now are the realities of a present in the midst of turmoil. Though, even the turmoil is eight months out -- an eternity given my present frame of awareness.

Each day speaks out its wisdom, urging me onward on a path I know to be right though I know not where it ultimately leads, nor where it specifically touches on the way. I embrace the uncertainty of it all, knowing the uncertainty to be an illusion, existing solely within my mind, for truth is fully aware of the Plan of Consciousness. And, in that Plan, all is accounted for, nothing is uncertain, nothing important is left to chance. Originally, I wrote "nothing" and then moved back and added "important". I don't know why. I'm just noting what I observed. The issue of Philosopher King rears its head again. I feel fully qualified for such a position based primarily on an innate sense of truth and what is right or just, and based on a common sense top down approach for tackling the problems of the end of an age and birth of a new one. It also doesn't hurt that I have a deep faith in consciousness, one that knows no bounds. I know that she has guided and programmed me all of my life to be able to recognize her, bow to here, and allow her Will to flow through me into words and works that transform the world.

Lofty thinking. For most people yes. However, everything I know about myself says that this is indeed true, the course of things to come. And not in the distant future, but rather as near as 3 to 10 years, perhaps starting even sooner.

I lost a few lines of due to a computer error. I don't remember exactly what they were but if they're important, I'm sure that they'll come back.

One idea dealt with RAMTHA being in my head. INDEED!

INDEED = 91 44 554 = 91 44 626 = Death Exalted : Meditating Man : The Lovers : GOD.

I drive a RAM 250, RAM THA = RAM 281 or RAM 2081. The later seems to be the most important right now. However, the former has a timing factor. RAM 250 was when I got my van in 1993. RAM 281 is 31 years later = 2024. We've seen this year before. It marks the end of a lifespan of 66 years that straddles 1991. [Appropriate = Death Exalted on the dot].

Now when was our country founded? RAM 250 - 217 = RAM 33. Imagine that! The Constitution was ratified 11 years later = RAM 44. Curious as well.

Now, why RAM. Yes, there is the obvious connection to Aries and to boldly going forth on a grand new adventure. But, why R A M = 18 1 13 = 1:13-81 span of 68, center at 147. This is an interesting number in it's own right. 417= The Emperor:The Star from the center out, 111 short of 528 = The Hierophant:Man w/ World in His Hand, which in turn is 111 short of 639 = The Lovers: The Knight of Peace. OK. I don't need to be hit over the head with a brick. Further, 18 + 1 + 13 = 32 = America = I AM Race = Victory.

ARE AM = 24 14 = 38:VISION => DREAM = 41= Ace of Cups = Wayne. Follow the sound then make the additional connections with the intuition. Don't worry, you will know when you are being led astray. There is nothing wrong with bringing through half truths at this time. In fact, it may be required for the material to reach and audience to whom it can stick. So long as the ideas remain a secret from the world, their impact cannot be felt.

But, how is it that the ideas are to gain their wings? My few attempts thus far to let them loose have been feeble at best. Initially, I thought this was due to my own ego involvement in their release. Yet, even in the attempts, I was guided by consciousness as to what to do and how. For some reason I needed to see these failures, and to trust that consciousness has her season for everything, including the dissemination of whatever information is supposed to go out to whomever is supposed to receive it. I don't assume to begin to know whom that is or how to make it happen. Interesting that I just noticed the time was 4:44. Earlier, I strongly noticed the time at 2:22 and 3:33 as well. These triple are showing up again. Hmm. What is that telling me to look at. 111 was a key delta between 417, 528, and 639.

417 = 3 x 111 + 84 : The Lovers Exalted The Empress 528 = 4 x 111 + 84 : The Lovers Exalted The Emperor 639 = 5 x 111 + 84 : The Lovers Exalted The Hierophant

111 = 78 + 33 Christ Exalted. How appropriate.

1 4 7 417 from inside out.

2 5 8 528 from inside out

3 6 9 639 from inside out.

These important numbers come from a very simple process of placing the digits 1-9 in order in a three by three matrix. What could be easier. It also helped that 528 came up as the model of a BMW that nearly hit me, and that since then has come up an amazing number of times.

The surprising new fact that comes from the above is that 84:The Lovers is characteristic when the numbers are reduced by the Christ Exalted Base.

111 is divisible = 3 x 37.

417 = 10 x 37 + 47:ASLAN Wheel of Fortune, King of Cups 526 = 13 x 37 + 47:ASLAN Death, King of Cups 639 = 16 x 37 + 47:ASLAN Tower, King of Cups

Dinner with Larry was very interesting again, as usual. I thoroughly enjoyed our discussion. Centralized planning was a key issue, as was an analysis of my attempts to get information out to the world, first through friends, then through increasing circles of outsiders -- including the President and Vice-President. Thus far, there is no feedback as to whether any of the seeds have been sown on good soil. And the sense is that there may not be until it comes time to reap.

The bottom line is that it doesn't seem to matter much. I will continue to generate whatever consciousness has me generate and send it wherever consciousness moves me to send it. The sense is that the seeds must indeed be sown, and now is the time for sowing. We have a revolution to carry out, "an intellectual revolt against present trends of thinking and being". Does this make me guilty of treason? Not in the least! Our forefathers provided for this change in their Declaration of Independence. The time has come to change the Constitution of the United States in very major ways. If our country is truly open, this can be done within the present framework. However, my sense is that the scope of changes needed are beyond what can be accommodated within the current framework. Others must realize that this is the case. I specifically mentioned it in my valedictorian address 19 years ago, at a time when I was only 18. Now, we are rapidly reaching a set of circumstances where the nation must change dramatically or suffer immensely. My sense is that we will indeed experience the required change because such is what consciousness has programmed into the Play. However, I still have a desire to do whatever I must to help bring this change about, knowing that what I must do is what consciousness would have me do.

I Am = 53 + 95 = 148 = The Man in Search of More Exalted (100) = 1:70(78) The Juggler [528 = The Hierophant:The Man w/ the World in His Hand] 528 was the middle of our three special numbers dealt with earlier. The Juggler juggles two(2) pentacles(5) within a lemniscate(8).

10 Aug 95

The full moon shines brightly slightly forward, above, and to the right of me as I write thus. Am I a lunatic. It appears that such is so. The moon definitely holds sway over my physical expression. The full moon and the new moon, in particular, hold the greatest sway. The Moon = 18. It's completion is none other than 70 = The Juggler = The 528. How appropriate this is. How much it explains about what drives my own psyche and perhaps that of all beings.

13 Aug 95

Once again, I found no time to write for most of the day. It's so easy for that to happen. I don't know where the day goes. Though, I did spend some time with The World Almanac, selecting a group of people and organizations to whom to send the Beyond Imagination ideas. The people range from Bill Gates, to Leon Panetta, to the Odd Fellows, whomever they might be. I let my intuition be my guide and ended up with 26 addresses more or less. I don't recall the exact count. I'll make disks or packages as appropriate and get them out on my way home on Wed. There is a sense of needing to get the seeds out, that I may find where, if anywhere, there is fertile ground. I'm writing to the chief executives of some of the top companies in America, and further about things that impact, but are not directly to their business. In the long run, I'm enlisting their cooperation in Reinventing America. If the government can do it, why not society? And, right now, society is effectively enslaved by the owners within the economy - more specifically, the largest owners in the economy. It will be interesting to see if Bill Gates from Microsoft, Michael Eisner from Disney, or the Chief of Citibank sees and responds to the Beyond Imagination ideas.

I can only perform the actions that consciousness bid me perform. Then, it is up to the universe to produce the desired result. I will continue to do what I must do, what I am driven to do by the voice of consciousness within me. Her expression is my sole concern, for it is her works and not mine that must be done in accord with the Play. I still write as if I could choose to do other than I do, as if, for instance, I could have awakened three hours earlier and got some daily quota of pages completed. Yet, such is not the case. Consciousness chooses the time and duration for these sessions, and not one word comes through without her involvement. On my own I am nothing. I exist to serve consciousness. The rest of my life is basically filler, learning about the nature of my Self and coming into greater realization of whom that I am so that my service can be enhanced all the greater as well. Looking back over my life, I see that consciousness hand has been there as long as I can remember. She clearly brought me to see the truth through Plato, Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance, and The Seth Material & Seth Speaks: The Eternal Validity of the Soul. These formed a core foundation at age 16 that made me even more different than those from whom I'd already felt separated. This was the start of The Hermit phase in ernest.

I have to assume the April 6, 2005 and April 6, 2011 are going to be key days in this play of Consciousness. The crucifixion of Christ, and the parallel scene in the film The Judas Project, drew such an emotional reaction from my Heart that I sense that somehow my role too shall include such an element within it. Not that I'd wish such on anyone. This is where the ability to leave the body at will comes to play (the 33 card in the Tarot). These days are both Good Friday, and my 47th birthday and 53 birthday respectively follow on Easter Sunday. Note: 47th birthday = start of the 48th year! Also interesting is that these are the only two dates for 200 years forward and backward when Easter falls on April 8.

14 Aug 95

Something about today is more special then normal. I was compelled to get Beyond Imagination ideas out today on a massive scale to people in government, industry, and various groups and organizations. I literally spent over half the day in this endeavor. 8/14 is a 22 day, but that in itself doesn't seen to be the answer. The 78 complement of 8/14 is 70/64. Interesting, but no "that's it" sense yet. This is the 226 day of the year.

226 = 2:72(77) = 2:70(78) = 2:58(84) = 2:50(88) = 2:48(89)

That's it! 226 is the day when spirit is expressed on earth, peace prevails, "happily ever after" achieves completion, and The Man in Search of More follows the Justice Exalted path.

The writing has definitely slowed for the month, but it's as if I am a man possessed anyway. What can I say? I've learned that it is certain that my job goes away in 7.5 months. To some degree, that's a numbing thought. I had been under the impression that I could walk my resume into whatever company wins the contract related to the work I do, and have a job. My sense now is that this is not the direction that fate is moving me. It seems that the division of Loral planning to bid the work will do the work in LA. I don't see that being the direction in which I am headed. At the same time, I literally have not considered any alternatives that involve doing work for another. Yet, what comes through me from consciousness does not seem appropriate for publication and widespread distribution. Seven and a half months is a long time, however. It will be interesting to see what transpires in that interval and what I am moved to do.

Something Gini said earlier sticks as being a judgment of me and my methods for getting my ideas out. Her view was that the feedback from the world is important and one needs to be careful about how one expresses oneself especially with respect to potential employers. My sense of things is to hell with any subtlety. I am what I am. If my talents and abilities aren't sufficient to do the work, fine; otherwise, my ideas and my work are separate -- regardless of how unique, or even crazy the ideas and beliefs may seem. Judge me by the results of my work, not by any other factors which literally have no relevance, period. I am free to believe whatever I will, regardless of how far those beliefs get from any sense of norm. Further, do not express me to hide what I am, for I will not do so under any conditions. I must be whom that I am, and I must express what consciousness would reveal though me. If this means that I am crazy, then the definition of crazy is simply wrong. My own experience is that I am aware, more so than most, and I have definitely not gone over the deep end. The bipolar condition is under control, stabilized between levels that swing from slight mania to moderate mania with an occasional touch of high mania, though never any extreme mania. Further, I am aware of the state that I am in much of the time. I don't know what causes the changes, but I feel comfortable riding with them. They've become a normal part of my conscious experience that essentially I just have to accept. Deep down there is a sense that the drugs are not necessary. Yet, both my doctor and my wife belief and argue otherwise. Until I'm in a controlled situation where the drugs can be reduced and eliminated while the conscious state is monitored for it's ability to deal with potentially increased swings, I'll continue taking the Eskalith and Depakote. There is some sense that these drugs are indeed altering my body chemistry in ways that promote my spiritual growth. Everything works together.

As to feedback for ideas from the world, to a large degree it doesn't matter. The ideas stand on their own. They are valid. Whether they are politically acceptable or economically acceptable is another matter, a matter that will ultimately be decided in the positive. The changes that are forecast will indeed arise. The Dawn is coming, and coming soon at that. A New Age will be here before we know it, and it will be very different from the reality that is currently experienced.

15 Aug 95

Yesterday was quite strange. As of 4:00, I've already had enough for today. It's time to refresh myself in the waters of consciousness for awhile and let her restore my soul. I'm flying again, even though I took my medication. Getting everything into the mail yesterday was very freeing. The sense is that a great weight has lifted off of my back. It could be weeks or months before I get any response, if indeed I get any. Somehow that does not matter. The seeds had to get out on a major scale. Whether any will fall on good soil and take root remains to be seen. I did have quite an impressive list of organizations, government officials, and captains of industry. It amazing what my intuition picked out of the World Almanac. To date, the feedback has been virtually nil. My wife suggests that this is because the ideas themselves are crazy. My sense is just the opposite. The ideas are correct, or close to truth. They describe the country and the world as it will be, and at the highest level, what it will take to get us there. I challenge anyone to come up with such a cohesive set of ideas that describe and address the fundamental problems of the day from an overall perspective. I did the briefings in about 12 hours over the course of less than one week. Clearly, the organization was guided but something far grander than myself. There was no thinking about the issues, or generation of outlines or relevant notes. Further, the briefings were each written in a single session and were not modified after creating them other than to correct a few typos here and there. The idea that I could have such command of these major topics: society, government, economy, and education literally off the top of my head without resort to research of any type is a bit mind-boggling. These areas show a breadth of awareness and understanding that a Hermit typically would not possess. Yet, the evidence is clear, the briefings exist. The ideas contained therein will indeed see the light of day. I know not how nor when, but it is as clear to me as the fact that I stand (or sit) and breathe. Interesting that this would be so. Thus far, the briefings are the cleanest expression of the Beyond Imagination VISION. The book, Beyond Imagination : Foundations for Creation a New World provides addition details, and presents much more information about who I am. The briefings bring out more of a impersonal flavor, presenting a body of ideas that should be judged solely on the basis of its merits and not on where it came from.

It will be interesting to see if, and how, people react. The ideas are clearly revolutionary. They call for bold changes. Some might even call them treason. Yet, the nature of the times is such that this is the only way out.

The time has come for a revolution, an intellectual revolt against present trends of thinking and being.

I spoke these words over 20 years ago to an audience that had no clue as to what I was saying. In fact, I really didn't know what I was saying at the time. There was no plan in place to carry out this revolt. In fact, there were no steps defined at all. Yet, it was important to express. It came from a place within me that I was only starting to know. Further, it is interesting that I would stumble on the original printout of my Valedictorian Address in the past two years after not seeing it for at least a decade. I was meant to see that two decades earlier the seeds for what I would become were already starting to show. Looking back, I've always been different. I've never really had any close friends. No one has ever been in a position to really get to know me. But then, neither have I been in a position to really get to know another. Yes, I've been married for nearly eight years, but I would not classify the relationship as close. Exactly why such has been my experience, I know not. I can only relate what I have experienced. Further, I can only trust that consciousness guides my experience to be what it needs to be for my highest growth and for the highest good of all. Detachment comes to mind as a basic attitude. There is a sense that in detachment, there is freedom from suffering. However, there is also a sense that detachment and love are incompatable. Yet, as the Hermit, detachment is the way of life. However, as the Hierophant, Love is the way. Even as a Hermit, there is a detached love for all beings. It is this Love that drives one to do what it takes to make the world a better place via allowing consciousness to work through one. Interesting. To hold a general love for all things without unduly loving any or being attached to anyone or anything -- such is the Hermits way.

It's interesting how this process works. My soul pours forth in these notes offering a portrait of who I am, what I believe, how I think, what I observe, what actions I take, and how I interpret things. What comes through is no holds barred. I cannot stop it. I do not screen it for what someone else might think or whether it might bring embarrassment to me or others, though by this point I don't know what might happen that could cause me much concern. The bottom line is that I have absolute faith in consciousness, and in my Self, the spark of consciousness that I AM. What must be expressed will be expressed in whatever manner is appropriate. Furthermore, whatever results from this expression I am both meant and suited to handle.

It's interesting how easy it is to speak when no one is listening. Yet, I know that what is being spoken now will indeed be heard at it's appointed time and place, and maybe even many times and places as the material gravitates to those with the ears to hear it. It's curious that I would talk about the written word in terms of those with the ears to hear it. Yet, that is how I think of reading -- as a hearing process that uses the eyes as an input device. We're generally accustomed to seeing images and pictures not words.

It feels very good to be writing in this manner again. My spirit soars, and does my Heart when engaged in this endeavor. The question is how to do what I love to do full time, at the appropriate level of pay commensurate with the services I am performing for society. Here it is up to consciousness to pass judgement on my contributions, not man. Actually, this is already build into the Play. It is so hard to keep the terminology from slipping back to that of a world possessed of freedom and free will. These are so ingrained into us, that we cannot imagine being able to have the same or better experience from an alternate point of view where predetermination and destiny are the chief operational characteristics. The only difference between the two is whether choice exists or not. This cannot be determined from within the illusion. The fact that we appear to make choices, or that we feel that we make choices, or even that we know that we compare alternatives before making choices means nothing. We are never placed in a position to go back to a point in time and test whether we could have taken a different path. Never. Everything that we ever do happens HERE and NOW. No other time nor space exists. The key lesson is to learn what it means to really BE and then to focus it HERE and NOW, in the very place we are at this very instant. This is how, and where, and when spirit is given expression. We, of and by ourselves, are nothing and can do nothing. It is only by allowing consciousness to flow through us that the works of spirit are made manifest. And, these are the works that matter most, for we are indeed spirit enfleshed. It is time that we find the ways to increase this manifestation of spirit in flesh in this world. This is the critical step required to reach the New Age. Further, such indeed we will do, it is written in the very heavens. It is also stamped on the beings who are cooperating to bring it all about, though many know not whom they are. Others have only recently awakened. Overall, however, everything is unfolding according to Plan. One might say there is no other way that it could manifest, anyway. Consciousness writes the script, and every act, scene, and line is accounted for. Even the words that come through at this moment. Yes, even these words.

It's been awhile since I've had such a span of time for writing. I'm grateful for each minute. Just being in a state of receptivity, active though it may be, allowing a source from inside to communicate and bring forth information of this nature is a real trip. You might say that I have become an explorer of consciousness. I go inside and connect with something through a process of which I am not even aware. Then I allow the information to flow as it will be it mundane or sublime. My sense is that I am not in control at these times. It's as if I'm on autopilot. However, my abilities, understanding, and vocabulary are being cooperatively used to express whatever is being expressed. The process could not occur in the manner it does without me. And, the sense is that my talents are uniquely suited to the role that I am being prepared to play. Yes, I mean uniquely. I believe this applies to some others as well, but not to the masses at large. Interesting, but the lack or readiness and awareness makes it so. The CAMELOT page. I've been meaning to see the movie First Knight with Sean Connery as King Arthur and Richard Gere as Lancelot. From the previews, it looks well done indeed. Perhaps sometime this coming weekend. There is something about that time period that is particularly attractive to me. I don't know why, it just is. And, it has nothing to do with history, a subject for which I don't care at all, other than understanding the progression of the ability of consciousness to express via flesh. It just came to me, the Just and Benevolent King. Ok, he had his problem with jealousy, bringing down a Kingdom as a result.

Now, here I am with Genevieve -- quite close to Guenevere -- awaiting my time to be Philosopher King, 4:28 or 5:28, possibly even 6:28; ready to establish a New Society for a New Age. But, who am I? One man, a Hermit at that. How do I qualify for a position that doesn't yet exist? Further, what makes me think that it will ever exist? My only response is that I know. All the signs that I see point to such a destiny, no matter how improbable or impractical it may appear at this moment. Also, while I am Wayne, the large letter composed of 13 diamonds on my ring is a "A" -- reference to King Arthur maybe. The ring is definitely fit for a King, and I knew it was mine from the moment that I saw it. In fact, I replaced my wedding ring with it. Interesting. With that act I signified being wedded to something more, for the ring has one dragon head facing to the L and down, as I look at it, and a second facing to the R and up. The "A" is positioned between them, standing as it were between the heavens and the earth.

16 Aug 95

222 333 222 888 and 777 appeared on license plates that I noticed on the way to work, in the given order 23287 = 2 32 09. How interesting.

My tripmeter crossed 666 on the way to work as well, but even though I was consciously aware of the event, and desirous of seeing the specific crossing, 668 was as close as my attention was drawn. It was as if I had no control over the matter. I also recall noting at about 658 or 660 that the 666 crossing would happen soon. Had I seen it, I would have put it on my list of triples for the incoming trip, completely changing the meaning of what came through. It is not clear right now even where it would have fit in.

528 is 6:66(77) so 6:68(77) is 530 = The Hierophant : Camelot. How interesting. 668 reversed is 866 = 8:66 = 11:00(22). Hmm, Justice, the center of my "X" reading, and one of the key ingredients in making Camelot a reality.

Just noticed again that 84 = 777 sum = 77 + 7. 777 also = JACKPOT. 84 reversed = 48 = The Man in Search of More. It also equals 4/8, my day of birth. Curious indeed.

222 struck me as extremely important, especially seeing it twice in a short period of time. Adding 222 to 1776, the Birth of America yields 1998. We could read this as the seven year span from 91 to 98, Death Exalted to Judgement Exalted. It also struck me that this could be read as the 70 year span from 19 to 89, centered at 54. Carrying this further, I wanted to know what was so special about 54.

Another flash to capture. 528 = 5 6 7 8, summed = 26 = GOD. How appropriate. Since we’re thinking mathematically 5 x 6 x 7 x 8 = 30 x 56 = Camelot x Balance/Justice = 1680.

1680 = 21:42(78). Wow, the triangle number for The World. Also, The World : The Couple with the Winged Lion Above the Caduceus.

1680 = 20:00(84). Wow, JUDGEMENT, big time!

These are meaningful on a very grand scale. It doesn't surprise me. However, I've been dealing with this number (528) for some time now so the scope of the additional meaning being revealed is enough to shock me. There is a sense of balance and harmony being revealed that shows a richness in the basic fabric of existence that is simply beyond compare. One might even say, beyond imagination!

Just noticed the time. 5:28, of course. The universe sure shouts loudly when she has a point to make. I'm only glad that I've been granted the ears to hear. What wondrous things have I been able to behold in the past 2 years. I would not trade my experience for that of anyone even if I could. No, I am happy to be whom that I AM, and to serve consciousness in whatever manner she directs. My body may be in this realm, as are the works that spirit does through it; but, my essence, my soul is in another domain -- one where UNITY exists in the midst of diversity, where each part of consciousness understands it's place within the whole, and knows that there is only ONE consciousness that animates us all. The sparks only appear to be independent because they cannot see their true connections to the whole. It's all a matter of partitioning of information. This is the key that allows the illusion to be made manifest. It's not the illusion that is important, however, rather the consciousness behind the illusion. Interesting that the world would have things upside down and call the illusion, "reality." Interesting indeed.

17 Aug 95

A curious point from my chart yesterday. The reverse diagonal that starts at the top in the 95 column ends at bottom in the 77 column at the number 16:The Tower, which actually is 3:16(77). This brought up John 3:16,

For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever should believeth in him shall not perish but shall have everlasting life.

If that's not exactly right, I'm sure it's close. What's even more curious, however, is that 77 is the base for which 528 = 6:66.

What an intricate web consciousness has woven. How intriguing the depths of the connections and the beauty of the patterns that result. How interesting that you only need open oneself to the universe and allow consciousness to express through you without exerting personal control over that expression to reap the great abundance that is there for all with the eyes to see and ears to hear. My forte has been turning numbers into symbols with meaning, a very different meaning than mathematics applies.

The sense I have is that destiny is about to unfold before my very eyes at any moment. There is a sense of completion, an "it is finished" kind of feeling. It's a new feeling, one that I haven't experienced in this way before. Revolution -- major change, is the order of the day. I can feel it immediately around me, though I know not the specific form that it will take. And, to a large degree, it matters not. What will be, will be. I trust that consciousness will bring forth the conditions needed for my highest growth, and more particularly to enable me to best achieve that which I came to accomplish for consciousness, or via allowing consciousness to flow through me.

I still have no sense that I will remain at LSRS through the time of the move, however short term that may be. The fortune taped to my wallet comes to mind: WHEN WINTER COMES HEAVEN WILL RAIN SUCCESS ON YOU. Actually, I had to look to get it right. When I did, I found that there was another fortune taped in a different location:

Both are extremely interesting. The chief question is whether the time indeed has arrived. This I'll know soon enough. My sense is that it has, however. The practical matter of where does the money come from to pay the bills is the only unsettled point. I have no doubt that consciousness solution will surprise and amuse me, and will provide sufficient abundance to meet my needs. My job is to do what I am doing, to give voice to consciousness to the greatest degree to which I am able at any given time and to work on my own awareness level so that I can be of ever greater service to consciousness as time goes by.

My consciousness is soaring more than it has in quite some time. As an integrator, I have things hitting me from several fronts, and I'm trying to make out the big picture from all of it. Part of the sense is that so much is coming together that I'm overwhelmed -- no, blown away may be a better characterization.

Drew three tarot cards on an inner urge: 65, 61, then 72. Interesting, the sum is 3 x 66 = 198 = 2:42(78) = 2:30(84) = 2:22(88) = 2:20(89) = 2:16(91). It is DONE. This is JACKPOT. These five numbers constitute my mission. It's interesting that the earthly complements (base 78) of the original three cards are 13:Death, 17:The Star, and 6:The Lovers. Interesting indeed.

It's also curious that this is coming out on Pg 36 = 13 + 17 + 6. The 88 completions are 23:K of Wands, 27:Ace of Wands, and 16:The Tower. Sum = 36 + 30 = 66.

18 Aug 95

45 x 45 = 2025. I didn't even need a calculator for this one. My 66 year does not officially end until April of 2025. This is also why 45:Black Robe comes up so much for me. I forgot to note earlier that upon arriving home yesterday, I pulled a single card from the deck. That card was 45:Black Robe.

48 x 48 = 2304. This needs to be read in the 04 - 32 context, span is 28 with center at 18:The Moon. How perfect for a Lunatic. Also, my sun is at 18 Aries, putting my spiritual energy there as well. This combining of Sun and Moon = 19 + 18 = 37 brings out the K of Cups with his throne riding on the subconscious. It all ties together, perfectly. The web is masterfully weaved.

Lion Heart = 32 + 25 = 57 = ELLIS = Large heart pierced by three swords.

57 = 32 + 25 = 25 + 52 , quite interesting.

Even more curious, LION HEART = 50 + 52 = 102, the third triple sum from the R path of the "Y" reading earlier. Adding ED to make LION HEARTED, we get 111 = 102 in the Death Base.

WINGED LION = 62 + 50 = 112, LION HEARTED + 1, also = LION HEARTED + ONE, but ONE = 34. (How curious that I never realized that before!) 111+ 34 = 145 = 112(133).

Now, we have a new math.

wayne => Wayne => WAYNE

23 41 68
34 34 34 Add ONE
57 75 102 ELLIS HARTMAN LION HEART
09 09 09 Add The Hermit
66 84 111 LIFESPAN DESTINY LION HEARTED

King Richard "The Lion Hearted" spoken of in the time of Robin Hood.

From the Almanac, Richard I, "Coeur de Lion"; reign began in 1189 and lasted 10 years, until he died at the age of 42. Note that 1189 = 11 11. Justice : Justice Exalted. The plot thickens.

That two very simple yet highly meaningful transformations, actually additions, to the three versions of my first name [no caps, first cap, all caps] would result in all components of my name my life span, my purpose, and even one of the years that my birthday is on Easter is simply amazing. Literally, there is not a single piece of information that is not extremely meaningful and relevant to me.

19 Aug 95

It's interesting that I went straight to adding "ONE" rather than the path through "one" and "One". Interesting indeed. "one" = 16:The Tower, "One" = 25:First Knight

23 => 41 => 68

16 16 16 The Tower = "one" 39 57 84

25 25 25 First Knight = "One" 48 66 93

34 34 34 Spirit Flying, Just Touching Ground 57 75 102

Only three new numbers come into the picture 39: Kn of Cups, 48: Man in Search of More, and 93: The Devil Exalted, Lucifer the Light Giver. All extremely interesting. 93 = 84:The Lovers [my full name = Destiny number] + The Hermit.

93 = 1:16(77) = 1:15(78) = 1:09(84) = 1:05(88) = 1:04(89) = 1:02(91)

Look at how powerful these numbers are. The Hermit in The Lovers base. The Hierophant in The 88:Completion base. The Tower in the 77:Falconer base.

The sense is one of deja vu. What is coming through now is the code that reveals to me my destiny. The time has arrived for it to finally be unveiled. It's as if on the one hand there is a gusher of information waiting to come out, and on the other, it's as if there is nothing to be said, only to be realized. What I know is that the world as it is, is not the one that I came to live in, rather it is one that I came to transform along with many others. All around me, I can see that consciousness is preparing the way.

Drew a tarot card. 45:Black Robe again. But, the figure was upside down. I believe it was the last time as well, but I'm not certain. 45 is the distance from wayne to Wayne, also from hartman to Hartman. It also struck me that the upside down position meant to look for it's completion, though the movie Black Robe had powerful significance as well. 100 completion is 55:Ace of Swords, 88 completion is 43:Abundance, 78 Completion is 33:Christ [White Robe?].

Something of even greater significance came to mind. I'm walking the tightrope of Black Robe x 2 = The Hermit x 10 = 90. This is the 529 line. 528 was close, within one on one account, but not close enough. My initials weh reversed = 855 = 8:55 = 529. 56 7 89 = 7:65-89, sweep of 24, centered @ 7:77 JACKPOT = 6:66 + 1:11 = The Beast + The Lion Hearted.

Isn't that interesting. 777 = the 84 Triangle = The Lovers Exalted.

Also, it's interesting that 529 = 528 + 1. Curious indeed. Pg 41. How appropriate for finding out such important stuff.

Another day gone by quickly. Yet, I feel that it was an eye opener, so to speak. Not a lot of pages, but a whole lot of insight. If and how that will be reflected in the notes remains to be seen. I do sense that I am on a course with destiny, and that we are perfectly aligned. Further, we have been for some time, perhaps all of my life. I can only say this with certainty for myself however. Thus far, I have no reason to believe that what is true for me is universally true, or true for anyone else at all.

20 Aug 95

It's late, so we'll make this short tonight capturing the key observations of the day. First, watched 1492, the story of Christopher Columbus' voyages. What caught me most was that he was an idealist and dreamer. In one part of the film, he is talking to Don ??? and turns to the city and asks "what do you see?" The reply is civilization, spires, cathedrals. Christopher's further reply is that it takes people like me, the dreamers, to build such things.

21 Aug 95

Colors of the Wind, was the top adult contemporary song for the fifth week in a row. Further, it only took it 3-4 weeks to move from off the chart to number one. It's a great song, with heavy metaphysical content. It will be interesting to see how much this moves the mass consciousness.

My mind was extremely active coming into work. Noticed a 5555 and parked next to a 4444. However, even more interesting, I broke down the name CHRIST = 3/11/29/38/57/77. This is why the 77 base is so important, and why the 77 card, The Falconer carries such rich meaning. However, the lower case, or single cap version Christ = 3/11/20/29/30/32. These numbers carry just as much meaning. I hadn't realized that this was another meaning for the 32 Card.

I'm in a strange state of mind. I took my medication, and have not skipped any in over a week, but the sense is that I'm here but not here. I'm not sure what to do about it, except to write. This seems to ground me more than anything else, but it is also a two edge sword, making me soar even as I am grounded.

I no longer desire to be here. The sense is that the time has indeed arrived for me to begin the quest for the fulfillment of my destiny. This is the first time that it has been revealed that such would indeed be a "quest." Then again, it doesn't surprise me -- search, exploration, pathfinder, and wayshower are all terms that resonate with the idea of a "quest." From that standpoint, I've known that this was to come, and have been anxiously awaiting it's arrival. The time of destiny is at hand. Yet, it is the will of consciousness that I must do, for I have no will of my own which desires that I do anything anymore other than what consciousness would have me do. Yes, I say this, and the words ring true, but -- are they true in my heart? Am I truly without ego, without personal desire. My immediate response is no. I still desire love and personal intimacy. It is the one thing that I most desire, yet have not found satisfaction. Interesting that this would be so for one whom The Lovers card is so prominent. Even the mirror over my bed has The Lovers in porcelain on each side. The figures are beautiful and were fully intact until we hung the mirror. I dropped a tool that broke the top of the male figure's head. We were able to repair the damage so it is only noticeable on close examination. I didn't think about what this meant symbolically when it happened. It has something to do with cracking through the conscious mind. I no longer sleep on that side of the bed, indicating that my crack has taken hold, and that perhaps my wife needs a similar experience. In my case, the physical crack happened nearly three years before the mental crack occurred.

I find it curious that 77 = the CHRIST base, one before 78, the Tarot completion base. TAROT = 20 1 19 16 20 = 20/21/40/56/76 = 76. How curious! Were moving backwards. HARTMAN fills in at 75. JESUS = 74 = the benefactor base.

Buddha = 2/5/9/13/21/22. This is my Heart's Desire. BUDDHA = 2/23/27/31/39/40. Note that the 77 complements are 55 and 37 respectively. Very interesting, especially if we swap the complements. 22 + 37 = 59 and 40 + 55 = 95 = 17: The Star Exalted. 59 and 95 is more than a coincidence.

[ADDED 4/13/98: bu | dd | ha = 23 | 44 | 81, this is of a similar format to my name 23 | 44 | 74 The sense is that this signifies a "family" relationship. If we add jr to the end, we get 23 | 44 | 74 | 84. Even more interesting, if we transform hartman => h(e)artman we get 23 | 44 | 79 | 89.]

So, what does 78 and 88 correspond to:

JUSTICE = 10/31/50/70/79/82/87 = The Hermit Exalted.
TRUTH = 20/38/59/79/87 = The Hermit Exalted again.
BEAUTY = 02/07/08/29/49/74 = JESUS
WEALTH = 23/28/29/41/61/69 = Ace of Pents, Spiritual Abundance
RIGHT = 18/27/34/42/62 = Blindfolded Lady, bound by VII
WRITE = 23/41/50/70/75 = HARTMAN
WRITTEN = 23/41/50/70/90/95/109 = Christ in the CHRIST base (77)

SOPHIA = 19/34/50/58/67/68 = WAYNE
WISDOM = 23/32/51/55/70/83 = The Hierophant Exalted

LOVERS = 12/27/49/54/72/91 = Death Exalted. How strange!
FRIENDS = 06/24/33/38/52/56/75 = HARTMAN, once again.

NOTES = 14/29/49/54/73 = Truth lies within.

Well, I didn't find what I thought I was looking for, but the journey was well worth it anyway. I have a path from these NOTES = 73, to 74:JESUS[weh], to 75:HARTMAN, to 76:TAROT, to 77:CHRIST. It's also quite interesting that both TRUTH and JUSTICE come out to be 87:The Hermit Exalted.

Off the top of my head, I can't think of --- yes I can, what about DUTY, HONOR, COUNTRY from MacArthur's famous speech.

DUTY = 04/25/45/70 = Big Shiver, The Juggler, 528
HONOR = 08/23/37/52/70 = Twice in a row, The Juggler again.
COUNTRY = 03/18/39/53/73/91/116 = 1:28(88) = 1:38(78)

Adding these last three yields 256 = 16 x 16 = 28. How interesting, 28: The Man with the World in His Hands. It's curious that this number, and factors of 2 in general are so important to computer science.

What other phrases come to mind of such significance?

CONSCIENCE = 03/18/32/51/54/63/74/88/91/96 = The Moon Exalted
CONSCIOUS = 03/18/32/51/54/69/90/109 = Christ in CHRIST base

If we add NESS to the end of CONSCIOUS, we add 14/19/38/57. WOW, look at the partial sums. Also, of course the total would be 57:Large Heart Pierced by Three Swords.

109 + 57 = 166 = 2:12(77) = 2:10(78) = 1:82(84) = 1:78(88) = 1:77(89)

Interesting numbers, yes indeed. Also noticed that the small case yields some interesting results as well. "conscious" = 03/09/14/15/18/27/33/36/37 = K of Cups. Now, how do the prefaces sub- and super- qualify that. "sub-" adds 6 to make 43, "super-" adds 25 to make 62. That's why the whole concept of the superconscious attracks me so. "-ness" adds another 12, resulting in 49, 55, and 74 respectively.

37 + 43 + 62 = 142 = 1:64(78) 49 + 55 + 74 = 178 = 2:22(78)

Lesson: choose whatever bases serve you. Allow the numbers to guide you toward the most effective course of action. Trust yourself and us to guide you on your way. Know that you are doing our work now, and we will not lead you astray. Believe regardless of what your senses may say at a given time. Consciousness is truly at work, and the Play will indeed unfold as has been planned, however it is through cooperation that this happens, not through a set in concrete predestination. It served you and us for you to accept that model for awhile. However, such models have limited validity. Their purpose is to enable leaps of faith that could not otherwise take place. Yours was a major leap indeed, so the perceived lack of freedom in making the leap was critical. For you to do what you have done in the past 30 months, you had to let go in a major way, and you could only do that by being convinced from your own observations, that you had no choice and by developing a radical faith in your inner Self, or in your case "Consciousness Herself" as you call it. At this point, what is right doesn't matter. What does matter is what is most useful for your spiritual growth, and for realizing and carrying out the mission fo which you came. Unlike most, you did not come simply to learn about self, and gain some experience. No, you came to assist in transitioning the world into a New Age and new way of being. The two go hand and hand. The New Age cannot dawn until the corresponding transformation of consciousness occurs. The overall timing is set. The key events are all laid out. However, their execution requires some knowledgeable souls to blaze the trail and lead the way. Many are ready to follow, they only need someone in whom they can trust to "lead them to the promised land" so to speak.

Soon, you will be called on to do more than you have ever done. No, these notes are not enough. The Hermit will indeed come down from the mountaintop and speak for consciousness a wisdom that comes from the depth of your being. And, people of import will listen because they will know that what comes forth comes not from a man of 37 years, but from a spirit that is eternal. And they will see and hear with new eyes that spirit will give unto them. Yeah, verily it shall be. And, through the cooperation of such beings, the world will be made anew in the flicker of an eye. So let it be written, so let it be done. It's been awhile since I've written those specific words demanding action in line with what has been previously expressed.

Yet, the words came through naturally, effortlessly. From whence such words come, I can only answer Consciousness, and in this case probably Superconsciousness. I find it most interesting when the third person tense is entered. There is a greater sense of separation at such times. It's a relatively rare state in these notes, but one that is usually extremely meaningful.

So, is grandiosity getting the best of me again? My sense is no, it isn't. There is very little that I truly desire in this world. So little, in fact, that it is frightening at times. I definitely qualify as being "not of this world", however, for the most part I am not "in this world" either. I fear that what constitutes the World of Reality for me only agrees in part with that of anyone else, and only in small part at that. Christopher Columbus had maps of an ocean which was said to stretch infinitely to the west and was full of monsters and demons of all sorts. He challenged the leading authorities of his day at a time when the inquisition burned people with far less challenging ideas at the stake. Fortunately, for Christopher, the cost of his voyage to the state was small compared to it's potential gain. The worst case being that the ships would never find land and the sailors would come to their deaths at sea. I'm starting to develop maps of the Nature of Consciousness and how reality is created. Thus far, these maps don't agree with anything that I've seen from others. Some of the pieces are the same, however the meaning that I apply to them and the way that I use them differ greatly. I'm not sure that map is even the right term yet. These are not things that I can draw, nor even easily describe.

Much of this involves beliefs about the nature of the world, how these beliefs are connected to one another, and how reality/illusion is created from these beliefs. Another part deals with the nature of consciousness and how it operates and expresses itself in the world.

What makes me an expert on this? Twenty years of metaphysics for a start, encompassing several seminars and over 1,000 books. Two plus years of extremely intense awakening experience [1993-present], with over 1,000 pages of accompanying writings. I've lost track of the Ego deaths and awakening experiences. So many happened so rapidly, that it was very difficult to pick up the pieces and determine what was left when the bulk of the transformation was finally completed. The transformations continue, however, at a greatly reduced pace. My sense is that everything was timed perfectly for my unfoldment to occur when it did. This can easily be verified looking at my Astrological transits at the time. As a Hermit, however, with very shallow relationships with the few people that I am involved with, even two years later, no one in my circle of acquaintances understands either what I experienced, or the massive changes in the way that I see the world as a result. Further, none of my metaphysical training prepared me for what I was to experience. Actually, that's not quite right. The sense is that all of the training enabled me to get through the experience without going crazy and ending up in an asylum somewhere. None of it explained what was happening to me. From one standpoint, all of it was right, but, at the same time each piece was incredibly incomplete, and there were not suitable links to understand how they might be related.

My background, formally in Science/Math/Engineering and informally in Metaphysics, both equally rigorous, allowed me to place my experiences in a context that others could not. It's as simple as that. All my life, consciousness has set me up. It's not hard, the right thought here and there, a little bit of intuition that one should read a particular book. A predisposition to math and numbers which later found practical advantage in Numerology. All along, I was being prepared for the time written in the stars, set by the very location, date and time of my birth -- a time of awakening. Actually, the initial three month square was only the start of a series of events that continue my spiritual unfoldment at an accelerated pace. How this applies to others, I do not know. At the very least, others born within a few days of when I was must have experienced the same energies for change. However, my sense is that the specific manifestation would be dependent on each person's state of awareness.

It is clear that the universe, that consciousness is speaking to me. Would this clarity be considered insanity by others, I wonder. It doesn't appear to matter, however. My particular reality does not yet seem to involve the right others. There is a sense that last week's action may produce some type of result. Exactly what type, I won't know until it happens. More and more, I'm feeling that any sort of a regular job won't work. I'm finding it difficult enough just keeping it together where I'm at now for another several months. I can't picture myself moving from my present location to the other building. Consciousness, not I will determine if it happens. But, I have no sense that I will move somewhere else for the final four months before my current job ends. Rather, the sense is that a new position will move me before that time. The question then becomes one of what kinds of things would I do? Here, what comes through is that it is time to do what I came to do, period. Exactly what that is still remains to be revealed.

TRUST. Know that you will be placed exactly where you need to be to do what you need to do and to meet your obligations. Follow what consciousness, through your own intuition, would have you do, whatsoever that might be. Be willing to risk whatever it might take. Watch your attachments, and keep them to a minimum. You've realized that your life is your mission. This doesn't apply to all, only to a select few who come to play specific roles. You've known since high school that your children would come from consciousness rather than from your loins. There has never been a deep sense of family past, and definitely no desire to carry one forward. It is interesting that this is the case. I don't know how many times I've referred to myself as The Hermit, and such, indeed, is what I am -- though I've been married nearly eight years and though I work with others at my job. [though only a handful or two of others on a regular basis.]

INTUITION = 09/23/43/64/73/93/102/117/131 = 1:43(88) = 1:42(89)
TRUST = 20/39/60/79/99 = The World Exalted = 1:22(77)
PSYCHIC = 16/35/60/63/71/80/83 = The Hierophant Exalted

NUMEROLOGY = 14/35/48/53/71/86/98/113/120/145 = 1:68(77) = 1:57(88)
ASTROLOGY = 01/20/40/58/73/85/100/107/132 = 1:55(77) = 1:44(88)
PSYCHOLOGY = 16/35/60/63/71/86/98/113/120/145
PSYCHIATRY = 16/35/60/63/71/72/92/110/135 = 1:58(77) = 1:47(88)

PHILOSOPHY = 16/24/33/45/60/79/94/110/118/143 = 1:66(77) = 1:55(88)
METAPHYSICS = 13/18/38/39/55/63/88/107/116/119/138 = 1:61(77) = 1:50(88)

-OLOGY = 74:The Benefactor.

INTERNET = 09/23/43/48/66/80/85/105 = 1:28(77) = 1:17(88)

ARCHITECTURE = 01/19/22/30/39/59/64/67/87/108/126/131 = INTUITION
SCULPTURE = 19/22/43/55/71/91/112/130/135 = PSYCHIATRY

The INTERNET has some extremely meaningful numbers for me. The Hermit/Wayne/ Abundance/ Man in Search of More/ Q of Pents/ High Priestess Exalted/ Chariot Exalted/ Man with World in His Hand in the CHRIST base. Very meaningful indeed.

SETH = 19/24/44/52 = Q of Swords RAMTHA = 18/19/32/52/60/61 = VII of Sword

Seth = 19/24/26/34 = ONE! Ramtha = 18/19/23/25/33/34

seth = 01/06/08/16 = The Tower ramtha = 09/10/14/16/24/25 = First Knight

THE RAM = RAMTHA + 4 = 65 = K of Pents The Ram = 33 + 23 = 56 = Balance/Justice

the Ram = 15 + 23 = 38 = VISION the ram = 15 + 14 = 29 = light

VISION = 22/31/50/59/74/88 = As above, so below.

TELEVISION = 20/25/37/42/64/73/92/101/116/130 = 1:53(77) = 1:42(88)

Look at the numbers that are showing up. These are the same numbers that I see on a regular basis. In fact, they are becoming so common that I literally expect them to show up and am surprised when they do not.

WEHJ = 228 = 2:74(77) = High Priestess:Benefactor[also, JESUS] in the CHRIST base. WEH = 200 = 2:46(77) = High Priestess:Happy Home in the CHRIST base.

1776 + 200 = 1976, year that I graduated from H.S. + year Jamie was born. 1776 + 228 = 2004, one year before the first year that my birthday falls on Easter.

This is 3 years before the completion of three cycles of 77 since 1776, an event that will occur in 2007. 20 - 70, sweep of 50, centered @ 45:Black Robe, the number that came up twice this weekend. This is also the complement of 32:christ (I AM race) in the CHRIST base. Interesting!

Flight 529 came down in an open farmfield. Only three died, including the pilot, out of over 30 that were on the plane. 529 caught my attention immediately because of it's proximity to 528 and the fact that I spent considerable time on it this weekend. 529 is 8:55, reversed = weh.

MOON = 13/28/43/57 Laugh! Of course! I am highly amused. = Death / Man with World in Hand / Abundance / Heart Pierced by 3 Swords

The CHRIST complement of THE MOON is 20:JUDGEMENT.

SUN = 19/40/54 Laugh again! Here comes the SUN. That's the 54.

19 is completed by 58:Peace. I was born in 1958. Curious. 40 is completed by 37:K of Cups, consciousness. 54 is completed by 23:K of Wands, also wayne and Ashland.

STAR = 19/39/40/58 Interesting! 1958 shows up again! HERMIT = 08/13/31/44/53/73 Interesting, completion = 04:The Emperor. CHARIOT = 03/11/12/30/39/54/74 Completion = 03:The Empress. KING = 11/20/34/41 Interesting, completion = 36:Gathering Strength QUEEN = 17/38/43/48/62 Curious partial sums, completion = The Devil KNIGHT = 11/25/34/41/49/69 Completion = 8: Strength. PAGE = 16/17/24/29 Completion = 48:Man in Search of More.

Note that king is contained in the first 4 letters of knight, only the i and n are reversed!

It's interesting that QUEEN = 62, a card that I gravitate to that is near the top of my "A" reading. Also, 62 reversed = 26 = GOD. The 35 configuration of swords on the 62 card has a completion of 42: Couple with Winged Lion above the Caduceus. Also, the bindings in the form of VII have a CHRIST completion of 70: The Juggler [528].

528 = 16:00(33) [also, 22 x 24] This is The Tower! Period. It's happening now. 529 = 232. Why hadn't I noticed this before. This is [Ashland]2. The question is what must occur to bring this down to earth.

23 x 25 = 575 = eye = Vision. This is the first three numbers of my SSN.

576 = 242. This appears to be where we are headed. It's interesting that the difference between this and the earlier 528 and 529 figures are 48: Man in Search of More and 47: ASLAN.

It's interesting that 29 is coming up so much lately. If the lifespan information is correct, this is the number of years that I have remaining to accomplish my purpose in this lifetime.

This is the transition that I am here to help bring about. The fact that Vision 575 stands between things provides proof that I am on the right track. There is a question of timing, however. Obviously we are not speaking in years. 528 has not yet arrived. It is highly unlikely that 529 will occur within a year of 528, though things may indeed move very fast once things start to fall. Reaching 576, however is a different matter. It doesn't make sense that it will take an additional 47-48 years. Everything within me tells me that it won't. I just noticed that 575 from the inside out is 755 = 528. There is no step. It's the same 528 as before. There's the leap of consciousness that carries us outside of time to create what must be when it must be.

Further, 576 by the same inside out reading yields 7:56. Yes, this is 428, but it is also the two drivers of my triangle readings. It's amazing that a few simple readings done at a time before I knew much of anything about what the Tarot was about continue to be crucial to unveiling a destiny that I know little about, yet fully trust consciousness to reveal in its due time. The triangle readings in particular seem to be most important from a mission or destiny standpoint. Much that has been unveiled today may help in providing a fresh interpretation that reveals additional information. We'll see what comes through in the days to come.

This has been an unusual day. I was unable to concentrate on paid work for the entire day. It's been nearly two years since the mania has been that bad. At least the time was productive from a notes standpoint. Hopefully, consciousness will move me into a new position soon, where this becomes my vocation rather than avocation. I don't mind working, and working hard; but, I'd prefer to be doing my own thing, sponsored by someone who realizes the value and importance of the ideas that I have to bring through.

22 Aug 95

A new day. And then there were ten. I am compelled again to start my day with writing. Yesterday, thus compulsion lasted the entire day. It's hard to justify work burn-out after a three day weekend, but such is how I felt regardless. It doesn't have to make sense anymore. I am compelled to do what I must do. Right now, that is to write these notes. What it will be tomorrow, or even an hour or two from now, who knows. A lot of interesting stuff came through yesterday. Both the quantity and the quality blew me away. I don't know how else to describe it. It's definitely been a long time since so much has come through in one day, even if it was a long day. The focus remained throughout. However, as always, the pages as written are my memory. My mind is a blank slate. I could not recall much of what I wrote about, no matter how hard I tried. Some of the number stuff could probably be reconstructed. But why, it's already been recorded. That was the work for 8/21. A new day, 8/22, has dawned. It remains to be seen what it has in store. 22:Fool Complete day on 30:Camelot date on 54:The SUN[dmy]. These are some very interesting numbers. 22+30 = 52, and 30+54 = 84:The Lovers Exalted.

Something tells me this day has many revelations to bring to light. Yesterday, 8/21 was a day of light. Today should correspondingly be a day of might. Tomorrow follows as a day of night. Perhaps, the Devil and Death cards will be more fully revealed then, though 15+13 = 28. How interesting. IGHT = 9+7+8+20 = 44

FIGHT = 6 + 44 = 50 Hmm.
HEIGHT = 8 + 5 + 44 = 57
LIGHT = 12 + 44 = 56 Amazing!
MIGHT = 13 + 44 = 57
NIGHT = 14 + 44 = 58
PLIGHT = 16 + 12 + 44 = 72
RIGHT = 18 + 44 = 62 Very interesting!
SIGHT = 19 + 44 = 63 Hmm. Not sure what to make of this.
TIGHT = 20 + 44 = 64
WEIGHT = 23 + 5 + 44 = 72
IGHT => ight results in reduction from 44 => 26.

Fight = 6 + 26 = 32
Light = 12 + 26 = 38 VISION.
Might = 13 + 26 = 39
Night = 14 + 26 = 40 Interesting, because I do much of my work at night.

Right = 18 + 26 = 44 Curious.
Sight = 19 + 26 = 45 Black Robe. Here he's tied to sight.

Just noticed sight = 1+26 = 27. I had never really understood the Ace of Wands before.

It's interesting that the difference between Sight and Light is 7:The Chariot. Further, it's also curious that LIGHT = 56, the driver of my inverse triangle reading. It's also amazing that of all numbers RIGHT comes out to 62, Right to 44, and right to 35. Aha, that's why 35 is important as well.

Looked down at the time 8:55 = hew, weh reversed = 529. More confirmation that the path we are on is one of truth. We'll get there when the time is right. I sense that I'm revisiting old ground, but in a new way. I know I've done some of the calculations above before. I don't know exactly when, however, so researching them would get in the way of simply doing them anew. Besides, I am prone to mistakes here and there so it doesn't hurt to redo a calculation here or there. Interesting way of looking at things, but you might say I abhor research. I much prefer allowing consciousness to come forth as she will pure and unafraid, without the constraints and straitjackets of any ideologies. Is it that I make my own truth? No, I wouldn't go that far. What I find seems to already have been there whether any other had yet noticed it or not. I would not claim it for my own, for truth must be free and will not be shackled for very long. I relay what I find, at least the parts that consciousness is able to pass through me. From that standpoint, I am a scribe. This is a position that I have held before. In the courts of Egypt comes to mind, but I sense elsewhere as well though I can give no name to where and when.

HU = 8/29 CHRIST Completion = 48:Man in Search of More
ECKANKAR = 5/8/19/20/34/45/46/64 CHRIST Completion = 13:Death

How interesting that these numbers would come out like this. Especially since I was involved with ECKANKAR for several year in the late 70's, early 80's.

WEH = 23/28/36 CHRIST Completion = 41:Ace of Cups [Wayne]

HEARING = 08/13/14/32/41/55/62 Now isn't that amazing. Look at the partial sums.

Interpretation. Hearing is my connection with RIGHT, also = 62. It seems useful to consider the complement partial sums for this sequence. [69/64/63/45/36/22/15] Quite a mixture. Some easy, but just as many challenging. The one at the end 15:The Devil is the least understood in my framework. There is no fear, because I know it's powers to be based on illusion, and more particular, upon our choice to be bound by loose chains.

DEVIL = 04/09/31/40/52 Wouldn't you know! Completion 25:First Knight LUCIFER = 12/33/36/45/51/56/74 Even more surprising. The Benefactor. The Empress.

LIVED = 12/21/43/48/52 That's better. Just reverse it!

Lucifer as the light-giver appears to be all positive. The CHRIST completion for LIVED is 25: First Knight. I think it is time to see the movie.

LIVED = Hanged Man / World / Abundance / Man in Search of More / Q of Swords

For the Q of Swords. Q = 62 and SWORDS = 98, total = 160 = 2:06(77)

160 = 2:06(77) = 2:04(78) = 1:76(84) = 1:72(88) = 1:71(89)

File Size = 22 59 87 = The Fool Complete : Aquarian Age : The Hermit Exalted 59:22-87, sweep of 65, centered at 59:54-55.

522-987, sweep of 465, centered at 7:54-55. 628 - 528. There it is again, this time hidden in a way that I almost missed it. But consciousness wouldn't let it rest until I saw what I was meant to see. Such is the story of my life right now. Consciousness is in command. It is her that I trust and obey, for I know that what is in her best interest is in mine also. At some level, we are ONE, and though I don't feel that awareness most of the time, the few times that I do are enough to suffice. I have so laid down my will that I definitely feel as the 64 card and as it's CHRIST complement, the 13:Death card. And, for this, I receive the LIFE of spirit, doing whatsoever spirit would do through me.

SPIRIT = 19/35/44/62/71/91 1:14(77) = Death Exalted. Interesting. Of course.
LIFE = 12/21/27/32 christ, CHRIST complement = 45:Black Robe.

Notes = 14/20/22/27/28 notes = 05/11/13/18/19 Interesting partial sums for all three.
Seton = 19/24/26/32/37

What more is there for me to bring forth at this time. My faculties at at your command, ready to do your bidding. The numbers and the connections are creating a web that is larger than I can consciously comprehend. I observe how each piece enters my awareness and appears to get its due recognition and be put in it's proper place. Then, it feels as if I am free to move on to whatever is next. It's strange, there is no sense of having to do research or go back to past writings unless I desire to do so for the pleasure of reading them. What comes now follows from what came before, but not necessarily in any logical way. Consciousness is not limited to such in her expression. And, it's a good thing. For, much that is true defies logic or logical explanation. Interesting that this would be so in the Western World especially which prides itself on logic and reason, though it is not at all clear from it's behavior that it lives in accord with what it holds in such high repute. My background in mathematics, science, and engineering makes me more than qualified to comment in this area.

I still have to pinch myself to see if this is all real. The sense is that I live in a world, Wayne's World, that is different than most -- perhaps even different than all. I do things, speak about things, and believe things that by most accounts would make me "crazy" or "looney". Yet, despite these things I can operate within the "normal" world on their terms as well. Further, for the most part, I'm able to do so in a controlled manner. This doesn't make any of the other stuff go away, not in the least. In fact, overall, it's the other stuff that I consider to be my interface to the spiritual world. Thus far, it's been through symbols, primarily numbers. Others must have tapped into this interface. It's there for anyone to see or hear, "if only they have the eyes to see and ears to hear."

EYES = 05/30/35/54 = SUN
SEE = 19/24/29 = HU, CHRIST completion = 48:Man in Search of More
EARS = 05/06/24/43 = Abundance, CHRIST completion = 34: ONE
HEAR = 08/13/14/32 = LIFE, CHRIST completion = 45:Black Robe

Interesting, SEE is contained within EYES, but HEAR is not contained within EARS.

ENOCH = 05/19/34/37/45 = Black Robe
DEATH = 04/09/10/30/38 = VISION, CHRIST completion = 39: Kn of Cups
WHITE = 23/31/40/60/65 = K of Pents, completion = 12:Hanged Man

2184 = 28:28(77) = 28:00(78) = 26:00(84) How's that for an interesting final four of a SSN.

So, where is all of this leading? I'm making a lot of interesting connections and observing a lot of things, but to what end. Looking up the central A in DEATH struck my attention. Converting to numbers 45 1 28 = 1:28-54, span of 26, center at 1:41, that's the Ace of Cups Exalted [Wayne]. No wonder 13:Death is so prominent in both my "A" and "X" readings.

Just noticed that backing up one more step, 2184 = 28:56(76). This is the 28 triangle number. So, my entire SSN is 575-68-2184. We've already seen the importance of both the first three and the last four. The middle two are a piece of cake. 68 = WAYNE to begin with. It's CHRIST completion = 09:The Hermit. 68 also = PAGE PENTACLES = 29 + 95 = 124 = 1:47(77). ASLAN Exalted, how appropriate. Further, the PAGE has 48: Man in Search of More for it's completion. 95 = 77 + 18:The Moon. Completion for 18 = 59: Aquarian Age.

You might say that I am a man out of control. My sense is that I am very close to losing it, on the edge so to speak. Yet, I trust that consciousness will keep me safe and sane; though, I'm not sure how to judge that anymore. It is not that I'm not competent. For, I am very much so. It is that I have no direction or interests other than to serve consciousness. And, in this service, I am much like 62:The Blindfolded Lady bound by VII. I don't know what is coming next. I have little idea of where I am going and only a few stimuli to go by. Yet, I move onward anyway, trusting that consciousness will open the way and provide me with whatever I need to know when it becomes necessary. From the recent page counts, it appears that consciousness is indeed telling me something. Consciously, however, I'm still only seeing the pieces. Many pieces, but pieces nonetheless. So, how do I step back or fly above to see the whole picture? That seems to be the key. Quit struggling with the details and see the entire territory before you.

You might say that one phase of your preparation is complete. All of the pieces have been planted, most of the connections have been made. It's up to you to turn it into a WORLD, ONE WORLD that unites all that you have experienced, seen, and heard.

WORLD = 23/38/56/68/72 CHRIST completion = 5:The Hierophant!

Look at the partial sums: wayne / VISION / truth&justice / WAYNE / 66 triangle It truly is Wayne's World. [41+1 45 Total = 87 = The Hermit Exalted(78)]

VERSE = 22/27/45/64/69 UNIVERSE = 21/35/44/66/71/89/108/113

In the restroom, there was an Air Force Times with a Capt Alvord on the cover. I was meant to make a connection between the cover and my last address 2728 Alvord.

2728 = 27 2 8 = 7:33, The Chariot : Christ. 27 and 28 are interesting numbers, much more so when connected to one another in sequence.

ALVORD = 01/13/35/50/68/72 Same as WORLD with different partials.
LORD = 12/27/45/49 CHRIST completion = 28. How interesting.
ORLD = 15/33/45/49 Slightly different partial sums including Christ and The Devil

It's curious that W = AV. It's even more curious that 15:The Devil + 33:Christ Consciousness = 48: The Man in Search of More.

I'm still missing something. I sense that I only made part of the connection. 2728 = 35:33(77) = 32:40(84) = 31:62(86) = 31:00(88) = 30:58(89) = 44 x 62, hmm. Note the 31 triangle in base 86 = 77 + 9:The Hermit.

I just had a sense that the 28 triangle in the 76 base doesn't do any good. My parents brought us to get our SSN cards when we were in Hawaii in '69. That is when the clock started ticking. 2184 is the number I was born with, so to speak, as in astrology. Clicking at one number per year, we're up to 2210 now, and will be at 2212 = 28 x 79 = 28 x 77 + 56 = 28:56(77) = 28 triangle (77) in the year 1997. The 28 triangle in the CHRIST base is significant.

I may be off a year in my count. I could have gotten the card as late as '70 in which case, the year 1998 would be a major transition year for me.

Once again, we have a major event occurring in 1996. They seem to be really building up. The immediate sense I get is The World Exalted : The Tower. Further, it appears to be hitting me before it hits others. I know this is because I chose to usher in this time. There is nothing else more important -- indeed, nothing else that matters to me.

Just noticed that the sequence 28 => 56 => 84 : The Lovers Exalted characterizes me.

26 => 52 => 78 is not bad either,
25 => 50 => 75
32 => 64 => 96
37 => 74 => 111

17 => 34 => 51 => 68 => 85
19 => 38 => 57 => 76 => 95
21 => 42 => 63 => 84
22 => 44 => 66 => 88

11 => 22 => 33 => 44 => 55 => 66 => 77
12 => 24 => 36 => 48 => 60 => 72 => 84 This is the triangle path!
13 => 26 => 39 => 52 => 65 => 78 => 91

Pg 57 Ln 7.56. I don't know where this is leading, but it feels right. Even the position was 5.84 after the period following right. I take these all as signs that I am indeed following consciousness lead and that I am interpreting what comes through in a manner that is appropriate for the time. I do have to question whether there will ever be a time when this material reaches people of like mind who can benefit from what it has to offer. However, my more immediate concern is with what happens next. I am fully aware now that my present job terminates in a little over seven months. I am also aware that my present state of being is not conducive to managing another regular job. Further, however, I have no contacts and no leads as to how I might provide my services to someone who can truly appreciate them. Yet, I know that it is already written. Consciousness has it all under control. The appropriate circumstances will unveil themselves at the right time yielding the position that I have been trained to fill all along.

No one that I know thinks in the way that I do. Yet, this doesn't bother me. I don't find it strange or frightening in any way. Curious is the right description. It's interesting that my mind and belief systems would work in the way that they do, without needing confirmation from outside sources [i.e. people]. At this point, I have become so reliant on intuition and the sources within that I would find it difficult to give creedence to anyone outside. That is a very strong and bold statement to make. In fact, one that smacks of the epitome of Ego. Yet, I bow completely to inner sources of which I am aware though I know not their true nature or source. Over the course of the past two years we have developed an interface which allows inner information to flow. For the most part, I don't even question it anymore. It has been right, or at least useful so often that I know that I can place my trust in it. Besides, even if I wanted to question it, where would I start? I know that this inner source is the place from which my very thoughts spring. Consciously, I have learned that I am aware to some degree, but definitely not in control of that which I assume to be me. Coming from a strong Ego nature, this was a very tough lesson to learn. Thy Will not Mine be done. In reality, it cannot be otherwise, though it may appear so until the ego learns to let go and let consciousness do what must be done.

It's interesting that such lessons are not taught en masse to all who will hear. Science and Religion might have a bit of difficulty looking the other way while such blasphemes be broadcast to the public at large, but the basic truths would ring true in the souls of the people. They would know the words to be right by how they struck not their minds but their hearts. We are a people yearning to be free again, but where freedom is defined in a manner that is different than before, a manner that provides the environment necessary for the soul of each of us to express itself to whatever degree and in whatever way is most appropriate. Such an environment has not yet existed on this planet. Yet, collectively we are at a time and in a position where we can make it so -- and very rapidly at that. Cooperative interdependence is the key, fostered by a social contract between all members of this society. This is an idea whose time has come. It will be manifest. The drastic nature of the change may make the manifestation a challenging process, but revolution will indeed seize the land -- not armed rebellion as in times gone by, but peaceful revolution that establishes a new order based on a proper spiritual [not religious] foundation.

There are no real examples in history of such change. Yet, I am here to say without a doubt that peaceful revolution will be the manner in which this change arises. It matters not whether there has been prior precedent or not. So let it be written, so let it be done. As to when, it would seem that looking back from '99, the bulk of the change will have been completed. We have an election coming in '96. It will be interesting to see who is selected to take the country through this trying time. I've sent my ideas to several of the major candidates. The Republicans seem to have gone way off the deep end to the Far Right. Besides, Senator Dole does not come across as Presidential material for the Foundation of Camelot. For one thing, he's way too old. I'm still not sure about President Clinton. He seems to be in need of a major spiritual awakening if he is to be the one. Stranger things have happened. Dole's a bit old for a walk-in at this point. That's still a viable possibility for Clinton. My overall sense is that he'll meet his Devil, Truth head on in a way that moves support his way. It seems that a third party run or endorsement is needed to take some wind out of the GOP sails, but they're also in a position to cut their own throat if they aren't more careful and veer more toward the middle.

Just when I think that there is no more to say, another thought or another connection comes to mind. I write and write and write, trusting that what comes through needs to be said, and further, has meaning that cannot otherwise be expressed. I am a voice of consciousness. Thus far, lacking feedback, I can't even say how good of a voice. Yet, I am compelled to sit here and write anyway, not having a clue as to what will be expressed -- and whether it will be either coherent or meaningful. But I continue. For, there is a sense that consciousness has something to express through this vessel. And, if I allow her sufficient time, she will indeed express. I no longer am able to separate what I would express from what she would express. I have no conscious sense of creation in this process. I do get a feeling of distance, however. Sometimes the source is close; at other times, it feels as if it is miles away. Except the distance is an inner one, not and outer one.

In one sense, all expression is the expression of consciousness. However, in another sense, the greater expression of consciousness requires the opening of inner pathways or channels that allow the creative energy (spirit) to flow through form into expression in your world.

Well, that was an interesting way of stating things. I wonder if any of the seeds sent out last week will find fertile soil, take root, and sprout. Further, how long might it take before I hear anything back? I know, the Play will unfold as written in its proper timing. I can wonder all that I want. It won't change a thing. That still doesn't squelch my curiosity. Even thinking about a new job seems ludicrous. I just can't see myself working in any particular line of work except as scribe to consciousness at the moment. Philosopher King might be nice down the road. Working out the big picture. Establishing the ideas that form the foundation for revolutionary change. That is what excites me more than life itself. It's as if we're at the time of our Founding Fathers and the challenge before us is to build a new social order that works in the world today with all of its complexities and problems. Create the VISION, then Make It So. That is the job that I have trained for all of my life. How do I get that across in a resume. And, who's empowered to hire me to do such a job? My will is Thy Will. If such is to be, it will be, for you will make it so as you have always done in my life.

23 Aug 95

It seems that I'm not quite tuned in. I'm still flying high. It's not clear when I'll come down again. At the same time, there is a strong sense that it does not matter. I found out that convening of a constitutional convention is no simple thing. It requires 2/3rds = 34 of the states. Now isn't that interesting. 2/3 of 50 = ONE. There is something very funny in that. Prior to 1957, 32 would have done it. With Alaska(at 49), this increased to 33. With Hawaii (at 50), we now need 34. Curious that I would be born there, in Hawaii, at a time when it was still a territory, not yet a state.

As with many other things in my life, here is another curiosity, a peculiarity. Lately I've found that it is best not to take such things too lightly, for they often carry great meaning. Actually, anymore, it seems that virtually everything carries great meaning. What can I say? That's how I see the world now. There is no button that enables me to turn it off, and no knob or switch that allows me to change the channel. This is my reality, period. Whether it is like that of anyone else has no bearing anymore. I am a ship at sea, be it in a sea of consciousness, steering by an inner sense of intuition that is my only compass, trusting that it will eventually lead me to whatever destination my destiny would have me reach. Unlike Columbus, however, I don't appear to have a crew. I am alone on my voyage. I'm not sure that I could have one any other way or that I would even if I could. Looked over at the clock. Time was 12:12, The Hanged Man Twice. Curious, that's all. Interesting. I do see the world upside-down from how most view it. Yet, this bothers me not in the least. In fact, it pleases me to no end -- for I believe that in doing so, I see rightly. It's quite humorous overall. Yet, there is a sense that should I carry it too far a straightjacket might be in order along with some padded white walls. So, how do I express as fully as I must that which I AM, while steering clear of those who might take offense to my expressions, or the expressions of consciousness through me. All that I can do is trust that consciousness knows what she is doing and will orchestrate the way as required to accomplish whatever needs to be done. We're back to the issue of TRUST at a major level. For me, there really is no other choice. I have renounced my will to do as consciousness would direct. As a Hermit, my sources of outside information and outside help are virtually non-existent. Consciousness is it. She has guided me all through my life to date, and the guidance grows stronger with each word and page that comes through and with each passing day. My experience is that she has more than earned my trust, teaching me things at a rate that far surpasses anything that I had previously experienced. Further, what I am learning is not expressed in any books of which I am aware, rather it comes direct from a source that is non-physical -- able to express through me because I am aware and permit the expression to take place as it does.

I carry on and on, not really knowing whether the words that flow will be seen by eyes other than my own. I sense that they will, and I disseminate some of them out, but thus far I have yet to receive any specific feedback on the Notes, on the Beyond Imagination book, or on the Briefings. Yet, this appears to be part of my training as well, to continue to work tirelessly though by all appearances my work yield no fruit. This is part of the 75 lesson, reaping a lot of leaves but no fruit for awhile. But the 75 eventially reduces [by 45:Black Robe] to 30 : Camelot. Also 55 splits into 30 : Camelot + 25 : First Knight, CHRIST completed by The Fool Complete!

I'm out of control again. Consciously, I can try to will myself away from the notes, but it is impossible to stay away. It is as if this is what I am supposed to be doing right now, period. No questions, no exceptions. This is where my consciousness resides right now, it cannot be in any other place doing any other thing. I, that part of me that is conscious, am NOT in control. I observe and see that what occurs ultimately serves me as well, and have seen it happen enough to know that the overall process is beneficial not harmful to me, as psyche. Not that the circumstances haven't been a bit strange or outright overwhelming at times. But, through each experience has come tremendous growth, and a greater awareness and grander world view. One might say that I've learned to regard my inner components as compatriots though it is not clear that I will ever see them by other than the results they produce in my life. Such is the way, trusting in that which is unseen, because you know for a certainty that it is there. Such is the nature of consciousness. Her effects can be felt, the more so the more that she is loved and trusted. Amazing. Yet, such is indeed how I experience the world to work. And, for the most part, yes, consciousness is the world to me, one in which I venture forth daily certain that I will return but uncertain as to where the days experience will have moved my awareness. And, one thing that I can count on is that everyday, in some meaningful way, my awareness will be altered.

How can this be? Not in control. That is ridiculous in a world of free will. That's exactly my point. My will is not free. I don't know that it ever was, appearances to the contrary. However, even if it was at one time, I freely chose to give it up very close to two years ago, and have followed with this same pronouncement many times "not my will but Thy Will be done." Such is how I chose to live my life, if indeed I have such choice. At least, such is the choice that I have appeared to make. And truly, now, I do not have a will of my own that I would promote. No goals for which to work, nor dreams, except those revealed to me from consciousness herself. Even at that, I still sense that my life is on autopilot, that there is nothing that I can affect or control in any way. The Play has been written, and will be enacted as written. Yet, something says there is more to it than that. The Play provides the overall context, but the actors have to deliver their lines appropriately in time and tone. Further the emotional interplay has to be right. Yet, all this is still worked out prior to the movie being finished so that it can be distributed and watched. Is our play any different? Yes, it's in 3-D, and yes we have the added limitation of being intimately associated with a particular form. However, we get the added benefit of really feeling like we are this being. But, it's all consciousness, existing within various restrictions and constraints. It's all consciousness, even the physical stuff. The question becomes: am I locked within the confines of flesh or am I located primarily outside of flesh expressing through a body? My sense has always been that we are spirit/consciousness having a physical experience, not the other way around. I'm aware that many would disagree, arguing that we are physical beings, period and that there is no place for spirit within their frameworks. This is a sad state of affairs that needs to be righted quickly.

So, when I told Dr Adolfo, "this is the book of my life", referring to Numerology and the Tarot, I was more accurate than even I knew at the time. It's simply amazing. Yet, though I've learned so much, it's as if I'm not meant to learn it in a way that would allow me to earn my living helping others individually. Even after two years, I wouldn't know where to start. As a Hermit, I express a general good will to ALL, and acknowledge the spirit within. But, there is a sense that I must remain aloof, apart from it all, if I am to do the real work that I came to do on a countrywide, then on a global scale. How is it that I can feel this way? What qualifications do I have? I AM THAT I AM. I can say this with no shame. I shall use all that I AM to serve the WILL of Consciousness throughout the rest of my days. I have come to effect a peaceful revolution that will pave the way for the dawning of a New Age. I belief that I will remain to see the Dawn, but whether that is in the Plan or not does not really matter. What does matter is that a NEW WAY of being is established that enables the Dawn of Aquarius.

NEW WAY = 14/19/42/65/66/91 = Death Exalted Appropriate!

With the tools at my disposal now, and consciousness to guide me, it's only a matter of needing to know before the answers start coming. And as the biblical phrase goes "seek and ye shall find, knock and the door shall be opened unto you, ask and it shall be answered". Maybe quote is a bit strong. The meaning is basically there, but I wouldn't want to bet on the specific wording.

So we have connections and more connections, and more connections still. Yet, where is it all headed? I'm a man possessed, on a mission with a specific destiny to fulfill. I'm also a man whose job of 6 years ends in 7 months and who may have to change work locations as soon as 2-3 months even if only to a building a few blocks away. Continuing my present line of work is out of the question. Given my present level of awareness, what can I do that would be true to myself, and to consciousness to whom I have sworn to do Her Will not mine. My sense is that I have reached my point of destiny, that moment in time that requires a tremendous leap of faith in what has been coming through for two years now, and has been confirmed for even longer than that from psychics, astrologers, and aura readers. I don't have time to be distracted by taking a conventional approach. Yet, there is a bottom line risk that 7 months from now I'm without a job and hence a paycheck. Is this a real risk. In Gini's mind, yes, very real. In my mind no, not even a remote possibility. Is that Ego talking? I think not. Rather, I believe it's a faith in consciousness that knows no bounds anymore. I only have to look back over my life to find countless examples that show consciousness has been guiding my way all along.

I've always had strange beliefs -- even for Californian's, which is tough to do. However, now, my beliefs are stranger than ever; so much so, that I would find it difficult holding down a regular job of any type much longer. In fact, I can't see surviving another 7 months here. My heart is just not in it. And, if there is anything that the last few years have taught me, it is that my Heart must be in it. Currently, the only thing I can say that about is these notes, period. No people, no things, no activities or hobbies. Right now, these notes are the only part of my life that is real.

So, what is the bottom line? Am I indeed mad? If not, from whence come such musings and to what degree do we accept them as valid? We'll know soon enough by what happens in out world; but, more importantly, how is it that one such as I could rattle on so. Especially given my extremely limited interest in and exposure to people on a personal level. I find it interesting that I can care so deeply for the whole world without having that same sense for each individual. Yet, I know that my talents specifically relate to developing the big picture and coming up with the overall spiritual foundation that will allow everything to work better. Further, much of this will come from getting the VISION, and then relaying it to others, specifically showing them what is necessary to make it work. Others have been prepared for their own roles in this process. It is clearly not a one person job. Further, if I can see consciousness at work subtle moving the mass consciousness, others must be aware of this as well.

I keep getting the image of 28:The Man with the World in His Hand and the equation that the last four of my SSN 2184 = 28:28(77:CHRIST base). Perhaps this means that I am the one to oversee the changes that must occur. Something about this doesn't quite feel right, however.

I sense that consciousness is toying with me a bit. The bottom line is HERE and NOW, and ensuring that each moment is lived fully. In my case "live" has a different connotation than it does for most others. To each their own, however -- so long as they don't harm others. Clearly, I march to the beat of a different drummer, or sit and think in my particular case. It's not done purposefully to be different, rather it's just the natural expression of whom that I AM. Further, my nature is such that the communication abilities are marked, and must find their rightful expression, wherever that might be. As of now, these notes suffice. How much longer that will be remains to be seen. I know that communication is a key reason that I am here. Mercury wouldn't be at the top of my chart were that not so.

As to avenues for work, that's a starting point. My biggest selling point is communications skills. Technical communication might be an easy jumping off point. It seems that communication over the internet and WWW is critical as well. I'll check on the cost of necessary upgrades this weekend. I can learn as much as possible about the web while I'm still employed here and then consider what possibilities make sense for the future, though I sense that consciousness has already taken care of this. It seems that I must cooperate to give consciousness the tools she needs to be in a position to better guide me. Further, if ideas are to get out, the web is probably the best manner to do so for the coming decade anyway. Between bulletin boards and home pages on web sites for the masses, and individual communication via E-Mail; this seems to be the way communication will be managed. Right now, it's one step at a time. Get set-up. Get on-line. Then start learning as much as you need. Trust consciousness in assisting you in the process. Remember, it is consciousness, not you, that is responsible for getting the right individuals to access the right information at the right time. Regardless of what you do, there is nothing you can do to control these things. Your job is to bring the information through and put it where consciousness tells you to. Not every action is dictated by consciousness. Further, some actions are directed as a test of the medium and to teach you not to be attached to outcomes, period. You do because you must do. What happens as a result is up to consciousness not you. Further, don't count on cause/effect to play much of a role. Bluntly, it doesn't.

My overall sense is that I'm on a roll. I don't know where it's going overall, or even if it's making any sense. However, none of that matters. I've reached a point where it's as if I'm drunk on consciousness. She can bring forth whatsoever she will. My TRUST is complete. There appears to be a neverending flow of words that can pour fourth, but I don't seem to have control of either the rate of flow or even if the flow will occur. I do expect that when I am moved to open the notes file, consciousness has something to say. My experience has been that this is indeed true. However, I do have times when the writing comes to a halt. At such times, I know to stop -- and resume when spirit so moves me.

I still have an overall stunned feeling about the certainty in change of job that must occur in the next 7 months or so. From a metaphysical standpoint, in particular astrological, my third and final direct hit of Pluto square Pluto occurs on 11/11.

PLUTO = 16/28/49/69/84 = 777triangle = Lover's Exalted, completion = 70 [528]
Pluto = 16/19/22/24/30 = Camelot, CHRIST completion = ASLAN
pluto = 07/10/13/15/21 = The World, CHRIST completion = 56

How amazing. But what is the square going to do? [pluto]2 = 441 [Pluto]2 = 900 [PLUTO]2 = 7056

Last 4 of SSN = 2184. On last trip to Big Sur, was behind truck number 8421 = SSN double digit reversed = PLUTO pluto. Note that [PLUTO]2 = 7056 = PLUTO pluto where the underline equals the CHRIST [base 77] complement. This is strange. It is more than coincidence. There is a sense that the three squares have progressed in just this manner. It is also interesting that my last four of my SSN can be composed of two forms of Pluto and the only missing one of the three is Camelot, which is so important otherwise -- for one example simply as the Tarot complement of 4/8, my birthday. Also, this middle component squared has a clear tie to The Hermit, big time.

There is a sense that the final square will indeed bring forth 70 [528] and 56. Both of these appear on my triangle readings. Further, this may mark the 528 point as well. I find it difficult to see how we can make it from there to [Ashland]2 = 529 in a single year. But then 366 days is a long time, especially if every minute gets "60 seconds worth of distance run" per Kipling.

On 11/11, the day my Pluto Square is exact, Pluto has just entered Sagittarius where it stays for about 20 years. Exactly two months later, on 1/11/1996 @ about 11:11 PM, Uranus reenters Aquarius where it stays about 6 years.

uranus = 03/12/13/18/21/22 Period = 84 years = 7 years / sign
Uranus = 21/30/31/36/39/40
URANUS = 21/39/40/54/75/94

neptune = 05/10/17/19/22/27/32 Period = 168 years = 14 years/sign
Neptune = 14/19/26/28/31/36/41
NEPTUNE = 14/19/35/55/76/90/95

Neptune was the timekeeper for the past 300+ years. My sense of things is that the baton was passed exactly two years ago when both planets were together for nearly three months. It worked out that at the time this was happening, the conjunction was square to my natal Sun. To a large degree, this energy triggered much of the change that I have undergone in the past two years. What is interesting is that in a very real way I feel that I have personally experienced the revolution that the nation will have to undergo. My only hope is that my work can help pave the way and smooth the path in a way that could not be done for me. Being shocked out of one's sense of reality is a very trying experience, especially when there is no one there to offer an alternative. In my case, 20 years of metaphysics was the parachute. Looking back now, however, it's as if the parachute didn't open, or at least didn't open completely. There was simply nothing there other than a deep and abiding faith that I could find the truth, know in my heart when I had found it, and trust my intuition to guide me along the way.

You might say that I am still doing exactly that. I have no reference books to go by, neither have I encountered any mentors on the way. Then again, that's not too surprising. One doesn't expect The Hermit to get his information from without. The source of truth lies within, where it has always been. Consciousness provides all that is necessary. She always has. Life unfolds perfectly. Everything happens as it must for the appropriate lessons to be learned. Remember, the illusion is an elaborate schoolground.

The words continue to pour forth, though there is a sense of straining. However, there is no sense that I should stop so long as there remains something to be said. I'm very curious as to how the coming 7 months will play out, and further how the rest of 1996 will unfold after that. My 38th birthday seems to be a critical turning point. Heaven knows, this year has been extremely interesting. I have no reason to suspect that anytime in the next decade will be any less so. The key question is how to place myself in a position that effectively uses my skills [and awareness]. I didn't really have to worry about this 6 years ago when I left the Air Force and secured my present position. In fact, the process was almost automatic. There is no reason the current transition should be any different. Only now, the nature of my skills and my awareness level are far different than they were then. The positions in which they can be used are not your run of the mill jobs. Essentially, I need to find others who are in a Hanged Man state, who see the need for what I have to offer and can pay what it takes to make it so. Geraldine said that money would not be a factor in the implementation of whatsoever Beyond Imagination is here to create. It all comes back to TRUST. Our bills and coins say IN GOD WE TRUST. I guess you might say that Consciousness is GOD to me.

IN GOD WE TRUST 23 26 28 78 = 155 = 2:01(77) = 1:77(78) = 1:71(84) = 1:66(89)

WE, THE PEOPLE 28 33 69 = 130 = 1:53(77) = 1:52(78) = 1:46(84) = 1:42(88) = 1:41(89) = 1:39(91)

E PLURIBUS UNUM 05 118 69 = 192 = 2:38(77) = 2:36(78) = 2:24(84) = 2:16(88) = 2:14(89) = 2:10(91)

NOVUS ORDO SECLORUM 91 52 106 = 249 = 3:18(77) = 3:15(78) = 2:81(84) = 2:65(88) = 2:63(89) = 2:59(91)

I'm finding it difficult to believe that the monologue goes on and on and on. I have no way to know whether I am repeating anything. I trust that consciousness is taking care of this since I don't consciously organize much of anything in my life, surely not my memory and my thoughts or thought processes. I leave it to intuition to guide me to apply specific processes. Even then, I am ever open to variations that consciousness would apply to any particular instantiation in the search for the appropriate meaning. You could say that symbols and messages from consciousness constitute the bulk of my reality. So much so, that I am definitely not of this world, or nearly not in this world. Though, I sense that the later is about to undergo dramatic change as I move into my new role, whatever that may be. My sense is that I am ready for whatever it is that I am meant to do. Pg 68 Ln 7.56, even Pos 5.76 confirms this. Interesting, 576 is 756 from the inside out.

756 = 9:63(77) = 9:54(78) = 9:00(84) = 8:52(88) = 8:44(89) = 8:28(91)

Here's a link to [Pluto]2 in The Lovers Exalted base. Also, this links 756 to The Hermit!

24 Aug 95

Just before that I had calculated that [44]2 = 22:00(88) occurred in 1936, the year that my dad was born. My birth occurred in 1958, 22 years later = 22:22(88) = 25:33(77). An additional 66 years brings me to 23:00(88) = 26:22(77). Both of these strike me as indicating that my mission complete at that time! How curious.

VOID 22/37/46/50 Happily Ever After
Void 22/28/37/41 Ace of Cups = Wayne
void 04/10/19/23 Ashland = wayne

NOTHING 14/29/49/57/66/80/87 The Hermit Exalted
Nothing 14/20/22/30/39/44/51 K of Swords: CHRIST completion = 26:GOD
nothing 05/11/13/21/30/35/42 Couple with Winged Lion above Caduceus

This year, 37 years after my birth = 22:59(88) = 25:70(77). No wonder I'm being hit so hard by change. It's coming at me on all fronts.

1995 = 21:84 (91). There is something very surreal about this. Death Exalted is a very important base for me. That this particular year would line up with the last four of my SSN indicates to me that my destiny is close at hand. Very close at hand since there are only four months left in 1995. 59, 70, 22, 25, 45, now 2184. This is blowing me away. The circuits feel as if they are ready to pop. At the same time, the fact that the overall picture is coming together in this manner is unreal -- the associated feelings are incomparable. It's as if I've been on the quest for the Holy Grail and have finally found it. Though, I am not yet certain of what I have found other than the keys to the kingdom. I know not how things will manifest from this day forward, but I am now a FREE MAN, for the TRUTH indeed has set me FREE as the motto at CalTech promised. It only took me 20 years to find out, to realize, what it truly meant. I don't even recall the mottos of USC and Stanford. Curious.

FREE = 06/24/25/34 = ONE
Free = 06/15/20/25 = First Knight

CALTECH = 03/04/16/36/41/44/52 = Q of Swords: CHRIST complement = 25
Caltech = 03/04/07/09/14/17/25 = First Knight, CALTECH complement!

CALTECH and Caltech are the CHRIST [base 77] complements of one another. Very strange. Yet, very appropriate. 52 is my personality number. 25 is my ray makeup. No wonder I was drawn to go there. However, the more interesting question is why did I leave? First, let's answer when I left = '77. Now, the answer to the first question is obvious, my purpose there was complete, it had reached 77. There was nothing more that the school could offer toward my unique development. Interesting. At the time, I just didn't go back. There were a variety of excuses, but it just didn't feel right.

I'm still finding it difficult to get it to sink in that 1995 = 21:84 (91). Especially since I associate SSN with work and my current position is ending in 7 months. This further confirms that a spiritually directed position is in the immediate offing. How soon immediate is remains to be seen. But, consciousness clearly has something up her sleeve. She wouldn't have given me this particular information NOW, unless there was good reason for it.

8/24/1995 = 32 + 114 = 146 = 1:71(77) = 1:70(78) = 1:64(84) = 1:60(88) = 1:59(89) = 1:57(91)

Looked at another way, 8 + 24 + 24 = 56, CHRIST completion(77) = The World. Completion(78) = The Fool.

25 Aug 95

This is 8/25! How curious, 528 reversed. Also, Jamie's birthday. Last night I picked a Tarot card, 7: The Hermit. Later, I picked a second card, 77:The Falconer (and CHRIST). Putting the two together, we get 7:77 = JACKPOT. This morning, I asked Gini what time it was. Her response was five to nine = 529. Amazing!

Thinking about the fact that 1995 = 21:84 base 91:Death Exalted, made me curious about other 104 relationships. In particular, the year that I graduated from HS was 1976 = 19 x 104. On the way back from walking the dogs, they stopped at house number 913. Looking at it now, I see The Hermit: Death. L2 = 91:Death Exalted. R2 =13:Death.

Okay. So, how does this translate into next year, 1996? First there is an overall meaning from the inside out, The World Exalted:The Tower. Definitely a year I came to be part of. How convenient that the last four of my SSN got activated this year 1995 in the Death Exalted Base.

1996 = 4 x 499. There are not enough divisors to be of any use, at least not following the pattern for 1995. Then, by now, I should know better. It's not that simple. 1995 was critical. I had to realize that my spiritual work was activated. And, it's taken two-thirds of the year to come to that realization. What is important in this moment, is not what 1996 holds in store, but what must be done to complete the preparation that enables me to carry out the position for which I was destined. This is not a cake-walk. There is a lot of hard work that remains to be done in the next four months -- including a few more major realizations. Even then, that is still only the start. You've chosen a difficult path as the trailblazer, yet you knew that you had what it would take to do the job. As The Hermit, it makes it all the more challenging, but it appears that was indeed a necessity, especially for you.

I'm looking at the bottom of my Rider Tarot Deck box. It's just there, in front of me, on the bar chart near the middle 913, the same number as the address that the dogs wouldn't let me walk away from without noticing. The complete number is 0 - 91 38 66 - 13 - X. The Fool, Death Complete, VISION, Q of Pents, Death, Q of Wands [X]. In the code itself, there are a few more numbers 9 780913 866 139 9000. The X is gone plus the leading numbers are The Hermit and The X of Pents [Tarot Completion]. The final number is The Hermit as well. This is a very interesting set of numbers for me.

Watching the movie Hero. They just had a suicide scene. In the movie, it is number 137 = 1:60(77) = 1:59(78) = 1:53(84) = 1:49(88) = 1:48(89). I was thinking about Duane Garrett's suicide jump off the Golden Gate bridge.

SUICIDE = 19/40/49/52/61/65/70 Amazing, The Juggler = 528.
Suicide = 19/22/31/34/43/47/52 Q of Swords, my personality number.
suicide = 01/04/13/16/25/29/34 ONE plus important partial sums!

Flight 104 crashed in the movie and all 54 people were saved. Now isn't that curious. 104 characterizes 1976 and 2184. 2288(88) = 2024, interesting, the year that I expect to complete my task on this planet.

26 Aug 95

Just drew a Tarot card. No reason in particular. The card that came up was 66:Q of Pentacles. Why is it that very little surprises me anymore. Then again, that's not completely true, consciousness still finds ways to blow me away. Further, it is those experiences that appear to result in the most stretch and growth. It's as if whatever I may lack in physical flexibility is more than offset by where my consciousness is allowed to venture and its ability to incorporate new beliefs and new states.

Where to start? Went out to do some errands. Bought dog food from the Del Monte pet shop in the mall. Due to passing $100 again, received a $5 credit making the total less than $15, resulting in a $5 in change for my $20. Next stop was the gas station, where I spent $20 on gas, and the $5 on the Super Lotto. I noticed that the serial number of the $5 began with D7070. I was only able to see it for a moment as it transferred hands. Even so, the double 70 amazed me since 528 is so important to what has been coming through in the past weeks, and in particular past days. The numbers were quite interesting as well. The first and last lines have the first four numbers the same [08 09 26 36]. Further, 26: GOD, the day today showed up on four of the five lines. Safeway was next. Got a few items, brought them back to the van. Noticed the Taxi 33 was at the front of the line. As I walked to the video store, I found that Taxi 22 was right behind Taxi 33. 22 and 33 are the two cards on the third line of my "A" reading. Walking back from the video store I saw taxi 23 as well and taxi 33 had finished.

It came to me that the next step up is 61 62. These total 123 = Ashland(Fool Exalted=100)

123 = 1:46(77) = 1:45(78) = 1:39(84) = 1:34(89) = 1:32(91)

6162 = 1662 from the inside out. This is 1162 + 500 [5 centuries!]. 16 62 is The Tower: The Blindfolded Lady bound in 7:The Chariot. The two are Tarot complements. The distance from 1662 to 1995 is the triple, 333. Now, isn't that curious. Here we have another major indication that 1995 is a remarkable year, this time one that connects with the the highest levels of my "A" reading. The sense is that something is about to happen on a very grand scale. Personally, I feel this will inaugurate me into the position that I am spiritually destined to fill.

There is a sense that everything is coming together in some way that does not yet make complete sense consciously, but at other levels is undeniable. There is definitely an anxious feeling associated with it. However, I don't sense that fear plays any role. I know the changes will be major, but I have already been through enough to be certain that I can handle whatever comes my way. I don't have to know exactly what will be. However, I find it extremely important to have an unshakeable faith in this thing I call consciousness. No matter what takes place, consciousness will guide me through it and lead me to whatever I need to do, know, and/or realize. That is a lot to ask. Yet, in exchange I have chosen to give all the I AM to do her bidding. There is a sense that this step involved a psyche death in a very real way. Yet, I still speak in a first person singular voice most of the time. A good deal of this is due to my lack of meaningful contact with anyone. On average, I doubt that I am involved with others more than 2 hours per day. That's only one-eighth of my waking time. It's been that way for as long as I can remember. I simply do not deal much with others, period. I sense, however, that this needs to change soon, and will indeed do so. A thought just crossed my mind. To get from The Hermit, to Justice, the center of my "X" reading,

It keeps striking me that "X" marks the spot, as in this is your destiny. Roman numeral X = 10 = The Wheel of Fortune. Somehow that rings true, yet the sense is that something is hidden in the reading that has not yet been revealed.

27 Aug 95

The only thing missing on the cap of my "A" reading is the very top 6, 84, or 777. The turquoise Thunderbird at 832 Jefferson is the 777. I was also doing the numbers for THUNDERBIRD in my head as I walked the kids yesterday.

[Note added 4/16/98: It is curious that the first three digits of the house I now own are none other than 684!]

THUNDER = 20/28/49/53/57/62/80 BIRD = 02/11/29/33 High Priestess Exalted : Christ Total = 113 = 1:36(77) = 1:35(78) = 1:29(84) = 1:25(88) = 1:24(89) = 1:22(91).

Drew a tarot card for the morning. Got 48: The Man in Search of More, the inverse of the top card of the "A" reading. However, adding 36 gives me the result that I need. The 36 was on the back of the bill with the two 61's. Curious indeed. Also, the Card was upside down, indicating that a reversal of the number might be in order anyway.

Colors of the Wind from the movie Pocohontas, stayed at the top of the chart for it's 6th week. This is a song with extensive metaphysical content. That this particular week led to #1 for the sixth consecutive week is a confirmation that the top of my "A" reading has been reached.

6 Also, the span of 84 in the file size!

61 62 Sequential bills from Trader Joe's

22 33 Taxi cabs one after the other

All of this within the space of one weekend! Something is clearly happening. The shivers are taking off big time. This is more than just being onto something. Massive change is forthcoming, immediately. Actually there is a sense that past tense is more appropriate. It happened yesterday. I'm not exactly sure what, but it happened already. Whether the manifestation is physical yet or not, I don't know. Although, if it's not yet manifest physically, it will be shortly. How can I know this. I just do. Pg 77 Ln 7.56 is further confirmation.

While driving today, I couldn't help focusing on a very interesting calculation. 826 from the inside out is 286 = 2 x 143 = 2 x 11 x 13 = 22 x 13 = 13:00(22) = 12:22(22) = The Completion of The Hanged Man (22), also the Birth of Death (22).

POCOHONTAS = 16/31/34/49/57/72/86/106/107/126 Very Interesting. 126 = 1:49(77) = 1:48(78) = 1:42(84) = 1:38(88) = 1:37(89) = 1:35(91) = 1:22(104) Wow!

On to another page. There is a strange sensation inside. The world is not the same for me as it was a day ago. Yet, I have no conscious knowledge of the difference. It is there, however, clear as the sun rising each morning shining it's light into the window I look through as I type this now. A nice day, the sailboats taking advantage of an unusually high wind, though there seem to be few left. The bay is not calm but neither are there any noticeable whitecaps. The distance is a bit plurred by a haze of some type, probably pollution due to its brownish-gray color. Yet all-in-all, I live in one of the most beautiful places on earth with a view that is literally "to die for". Then again, I pay dearly for this precious piece of real estate. However, there is something to be said about essentially being able to buy the best house in the neighborhood when I was 31. Interesting, just before I came up to write, I passed by the couch with my wife's tarot deck in a position where a particular card stood out. Curious chap that I am, I picked the card -- 31.

Interesting information from The Tarot Book by Jana Riley. She uses the Crowley formalism with King, Queen, Prince, and Princess rather than the Knight and Page used by the Rider formalism. What I found curious was the link to the Jungian Types. Personally, I am INT/FP, the thinking and feeling component were evenly balanced at 0. Looking at the corresponding types, we get:

INFP Princess of Cups The Dreamer Inner Love
INTP Princess of Swords The Initiator Inner Intellect

These would correspond to 40 and 54. Total = 94 = The Tower Exalted. Note also that the number midway between the two is 47:ASLAN. There was no other way for that to happen. Also, I imagine that it is relatively rare for zero to show up in any of the four dimensions showing no preference towards one or the other.

28 Aug 95

The month continues to move on. I still have this incredible sense that a major transition was completed this past weekend. Nearly on automatic, I took a different path through Monterey, one that I haven't taken in several months to avoid the road construction that was being done. Within one block of the divergence point, I saw a car with 777 on it's license plate, and a few cars in front of that 999 in the form of III. The one time I noticed on the way in was exactly 8:55, on a digital clock! This is 529, the number so important last week! [23]2.

RED SHIFT = 18/23/27 19/27/36/42/62 TOTAL = 89 = Justice Exalted. I just sent a letter to this company for a WWW account so that I can start to get the WORD of Beyond Imagination out to the world at large. Curious.

WORD = 23/38/56/60 Look at those numbers. The Lovers with the God Force.
Word = 23/29/38/42 Every number has great relevance.

WORLD = 23/38/56/68/72 Highly interesting as well.
World = 23/29/38/41/45 Black Robe

LOVE = 12/27/49/54 Page of Swords
Love = 12/18/22/27 Ace of Wands

GOD = 07/22/26 Page of Wands
god = 07/13/17 The Star Isn't that curious!

704 = 9:11(77) = 9:02(78) = 8:48(82) = 8:32(84) = 8:16(86) = 8:00(88) = 7:81(89) = 7:67(91)

With G and D surrounding a zero, we get a very interesting set of numbers. I couldn't keep from laughing when I saw 9:11 pop up in the CHRIST base. 9-1-1, how appropriate. Also seeing 832 in The Lovers Exalted base was an eye popper as well. 832 is the gold address on the red door that Foofer insisted that I see. It started much of the time correlation stuff, and really made the symbols of the spiritual world come to life for me. It's another of the 104 multiples, this time x 8. It's amazing how important these numbers are.

764, The Chariot: Thy Will be Done just doesn't have the same force. Here's when the moment of truth comes. Neither the conscious not the subconscious can find it alone. It is the marriage of the two into one that creates the whole. The two were never separated except by walls and barriers within the mind and belief systems. This is the sacred union, that of the self with the Self. All outer unions pale by comparison, though they have their purposes and can be filled with joy when the right souls are involved.

There's another connection coming here 26 x 28 = 728 x 3 = 2184, last four of SSN. 728 is 7 x 104. 104 = 4 x 26 = 8 x 13 = 4:16(22) = 3:38(22).

I guess I'm demonstrating that if you look hard enough at something you will indeed see interesting things that you may or may not have anticipated. It's especially interesting in this case because I allowed my intuition to guide the method even more than normal. It was as if I was forcing things on the one hand, yet allowing and trusting that consciousness via my intuition would indeed come through. And, that she did. There is still this overwhelming feeling that my role has changed. Physically, the manifestation may not yet be here, but it is indeed complete. I haven't felt like this before, so I don't know exactly of what I speak. However, there is a certainty in my disposition, a knowingness that a course of action is set upon. Exactly where it will take me I do not know. Further, it does not matter. I will follow the road to wherever it leads. Already, there is a spring in my step, knowing that the time for dissemination of information has arrived. The means, so to speak, has been dumped in my lap, and I intend to pursue it with everything that is in me. I'm truly excited about life again. It has been some time since I've felt like this. Further, I'm happy without regard to what is happening. The bottom line is that none of it matters. I'm happy because of where my state of awareness is. I'm happy because I am in synch with my self and my Self, and the mission that consciousness has in store for me. I still don't know what I'll be doing in seven months, but Joseph Campbell's statement "follow your bliss" comes to mind. I trust that in doing so, consciousness will find the proper way to accommodate my needs. You could say that my new employer is consciousness. The sense is that my employment has already begun, though consciousness may use Loral to continue my pay for from 1-7 more months while a suitable transition is arranged. How much of this must I do on my own? I can only trust that I will know. Consciousness will guide me here as well.

Interesting. Bernie Ward was just on the radio asking for donations to the Garrett Trust, to specifically help out the family of Duane Garrett, the talk show host that committed suicide by jumping off the Golden Gate bridge. I didn't hear why there were money problems. You would think that with all of Duane's friends, they would find more than enough resources to cover his family's needs. Between the law firm, the radio station work, the television work, and the sports memorabilia stuff -- he made a lot of money. If he used it all or misused it, that seems tough, let his former employers bear the brunt of the bill. Let the people he helped be the one's that help him. There is a sense of what constitutes Justice here. We have many people who are homeless and hungry. Why do the Garrett's warrant any special consideration? That their husband/father took his own life does not entitle them to any special care. That their standard of living may have to drop as a result is tragic, but it is what happens in life. Believing that this was all Predestined to play out in this manner, the family will reap the experience that it designed for itself. Bernie's position seems a bit much. I cannot understand singling out one family and using radio station time/resources to beg for their benefit. No other families are granted such resources, though their situations may be all the more dire. The unfairness of this smacks me in the face. It's like abusing one's position for personal gain. Oh, in this case, personal is for the benefit of close friends. However, these are also people used to a relatively luxurious standard of living. What right have they for this to continue?

My concern comes from a sense of Justice. If I have financial difficulties, there is no one there to help -- neither do I expect there to be. I am responsible for my actions, regardless of whether they were predestined or not. I create my reality, even if not consciously. In a true community, this would not be a problem. The wife and kids would get what they need, regardless of Duane's actions. The question now is what do the wife and kids need? And, how do we reconcile their needs with the needs of others? Does their prior to the suicide standing, give them any advantage? My sense is no. It is not fair to give them special treatment, period. Bernie is getting himself in further and further. This is an area where he is extremely partial and very personally involved. It's understandable, but he's acting out of a loving desire to help. Justice and balance have nothing to do with it. It's his show, he can do what he wants with it. However, my inner sense is that while this is good, it is not right. How curious.

The page count continues to climb, one by one, as consciousness fills the blankness with whatever she would bring through. I attribute everything to consciousness now. The deepness may vary, but the thoughts all spring from an inner source which appears as a voice in my head that gets translated into what appears on the screen via a closed conscious loop involving my fingers, sight and brain trying to ensure that what appears matches what is heard. Hour after hour is spent in this process. Besides work and sleep, generating these notes is the activity that consumes more of my time than any other. It's been this way for two years now. We're rapidly approaching the two year point from my initial meeting with Dr Adolfo.

29 Aug 95

Another day for consciousness to speak. If 75 pages was respectable for last month, we're really doing well this month at 83:The Hierophant exalted and counting. We still have three days remaining this month. Who knows where that will take us. Though, it will be curious to see where it does end. I have no real control over what comes through, how much comes through, or when it comes through. I have truly left this for consciousness to determine. I am but a willing servant, awaiting word from consciousness as to what work she would have me do, then acting with the full force of my being to make it so. Usually, this involves being the conduit through which spirit may flow to do her works. I joyfully choose this way of being. Not my will but Thine be done. It's still a bit of a struggle, but, more and more doing things in spirits way is the only way that makes any real sense and feels right. There is a knowingness in my Heart that no matter the obstacle that comes in my way, spirit is there by my side to help me overcome it. I entered this existence with everything necessary to fulfill a great spiritual purpose, and consciousness herself has nurtured and prepared me for the tasks that lie ahead. This is a certainty for me. There is no doubt of it's veracity.

Pg 84: The Lovers Exalted. This is but the third time that I've reached this far in a given month. It's amazing how many times this number has come up in just a few days. I keep looking over to the top of my "A" reading. There is something this is telling me. Perhaps the message is that I finally AM what my "A" reading specifies, and have truly earned the status symbolized in my ring. The question now is: who am I? The ring offers 13[diamonds, 1 large + 12 small] + 2[large rubies (pink/red)] + 4[small emeralds (green)] = 19 positions. However, I own the ring, and it is highly unlikely that there are others like it. The 13 diamonds seem to correspond to Christ and the twelve disciples. The rubies signify 11, the emeralds 22; combined they yield 33. The rubies are also associated with the Heart, and the one on the lower left, though half a caret, is barely visible -- possible indicating that the grounded heart is shielded, perhaps a sign of The Hermit presence. The ruby on the upper right seems to show that the spiritual heart is afire, boldly stretching up into the heavens. The dragon on the left looks down to earth, while the one on the right looks to the heavens. Both look through bright green emeralds. Further, the emeralds are in line with the 3rd row of the "A", 22 and 33 in the "A" reading.

ARTHUR = 01/19/39/47/68/86 reversed = 68 PENDRAGON = 16/21/36/40/58/59/66/81/96 reversed = 69

182 = 2:28(77) = 2:26(78) = 2:14(84) = 2:06(88) = 2:04(89) = 2:00(91) = 1:78(104)

Is that why the very idea of Camelot stirs my veins so? "Might for Right" was the rallying cry that changed warring tribes into relatively peaceful men. It is definitely interesting that DRAGON is a major part of the name.

I've reached a point where the numbers are like a second language for me. However, it is not easy to convert what I am seeing at automatically to words. So, many things are obvious that I assume that by now it will be obvious to others as well. Besides, it would take far too much time and space to cover all the details, when it is the higher level of the forest, not the trees that are important. This is my forte anyway. It is the big picture that most excite me.

My computer donged at 5:28, announcing the arrival of an E-Mail message. The person was looking for a driver for an AMIS Mouse. That's a very peculiar name. AM and IS, two forms of To Be. How strange for the two to show up together in this manner.

AMIS = 01/14/23/42 Very interesting numbers. Yes, indeed.

AM = 14, IS = 28 14 28 is the sum for the 14 triangle. Temperance. Completion of 74.

TO BE = 20/35/37/42 Isn't that curious as well?

14, 28, and 42 are all variations on a single there, that of existence, of beingness.

AM, IS, TO BE. The next number in the sequence is 56, followed by 70: The 5:28 number that was the time of the message that started this path of inquiry. Whoa, one more step = 84 and the one after that 98. So, what is it about the multiples of 14 that are so important. The Tarot recognizes this as well, as each of the suits of the minor arcana number 14.

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13

14 28 42 56 70 84 98 112 126 140 154 168 182
(77) 1:07 1:21 1:35 1:49 1:63 2:00 2:14 2:28
(78) 1:06 1:20 1:34 1:48 1:62 1:76 2:12 2:26
(84) 1:00 1:14 1:28 1:42 1:56 1:70 2:00 2:14
(88) 1:10 1:24 1:38 1:52 1:66 1:80 2:06
(89) 1:09 1:23 1:37 1:51 1:65 1:79 2:04
(91) 1:07 1:21 1:35 1:49 1:63 1:77 2:00
(94) 1:04 1:18 1:32 1:46 1:60 1:74 1:88

(104) 1:08 1:22 1:36 1:50 1:64 1:78

Isn't that curious. 13: Death columns fill the screen. Also the next row 14 x 14 = 196 = 916 from the inside out. 916 = The Hermit: The Tower.

196 = 14 x 14 = 2 x 2 x 7x 7 = 7 x 28. 728 = 7 x 104! Also 728 = The Chariot:The Man with the world in his hands. Further, this is one-third of 2184. The picture that comes to mind is three squares each with sides of 7, perimeters of 28, coming together to form a triangle with sides of 7, each side extending out into a square.

The result is a geometric form for 2184. The perimeter of the triangle is the 21, and the sum of the perimeters of the squares is 3 x 28 = 84. This brings us back to the book Numerology and the Divine Triangle. It doesn't get any more Divine than this. We have The World in the middle triangle, and we have each square with are = 49, total area = 147. Major shivers. This is an extremely inportant number in the scheme of things. First, it is ASLAN exalted (100). Next it is The Aquarian Age Exalted(88), then it is The Ace of Pentacles Exalted [abundance from spirit] (78). Finally, it is 1:70(77) The Juggler Exalted in the Christ base.

7 8 9 -- This is the layout of keys on the calculator.

4 5 6 -- 1 4 7 just made it's presence known.

1 2 3 -- 528 has been showing up incessantly.
-------------------------
7 8 9

My intuition tells me that 693 is the missing number of this grouping. 693 = 9 x 77. How appropriate can I get, The Hermit in the CHRIST base. It's as if it's too good to be true.

693 = 9:00(77) = 8:68(78) = 8:20(84) = 7:76(88) = 7:69(89) = 7:55(91) That sent a shiver all through my body. And a very cold one at that.

I'm a man with a mission now. I'm moved to set up Beyond Imagination information on the WWW. It's a first step, but one that allows for worldwide dissemination of information to those moved by consciousness to find and read it. My efforts thus far have been to target my audience to some pretty high level folks. There has thus far been no feedback to show that this has been even mildly successful. Yet, I believed in these ideas that have come through me so much, that I did not care about any consequences. I know in my Heart that a have a role to play, a major role, in bringing about a peaceful revolution. Just thinking about it causes the blood to rush forth through my veins with increased fury.

30 Aug 95

Our symbol systems contain a wealth of information that most people never even begin to access. Yet, even the Bible says that in the beginning was the word, the Logos, and out of it everything in our reality was manifest.

Consciousness chooses which connections to reveal to me at particular times. I have no motive, purpose, or intent other than to do as consciousness bids me to do, and come to Know MySelf as well as possible in the process so that my own level of awareness may been enhanced that I may be an even greater vessel for doing the Great work. Specifically what my part in this is, I know not -- presumably because I have no need to know yet. Oh, I've received many hints, but I have no idea of how to get there from here other than to take it one day at a time, doing whatever I am moved by consciousness to do on that particular day. I have a job [at least for the next 7 months] but clearly I've reached a point where other that providing a needed paycheck, it is not what I am meant to be doing. I sensed that something powerful changed last weekend. It was as if Judgement Day had arrived and I passed with flying colors. Along with that came a deep sense that a position was offered and accepted on an inner level. It was a strong feeling, without any images or specifics attached. I don't know what, how, when, or where -- yet, I am certain that it is indeed where I will be next and that the transition will occur soon, possible before the end of the year. If not, when the time is right. I trust consciousness to know when that will be. However, it might get a bit dicey, if consciousness chooses to test my patience and my faith. Can't worry about that now. What will be, will be. Enhancing awareness and serving consciousness are my chief concerns right now. Everything else is secondary. Interesting.

I don't know where the ideas that come into my head come from. Literally, my function is that of scribe, though I do try to understand what comes through as well. That is part of what makes the process as slow as it is. A page per hour is a very respectable rate. However, that is only the generation time, the actual time that I sit in front of a screen and type whatever comes into my head. There is no editing of these notes. A new date is added on every new day for which notes are generated. In months like this, nearly everyday includes an entry and at least half a page of notes. In more lax months, several days go by in which not a single note is written. Why this varies so much from month to month is beyond me, I simply do not know. It appears, however, that I need to be in an appropriate conscious state for this communication to take place as it does.

You might say that much of what you see here are the notes of a consciousness subjectively observing itself. There is no way this can be done objectively. By it's very nature, consciousness is subjective -- she will not submit to objective probing and reveal her true beauty. This lies within and is there for each individual to find. Thus far, as a society, we make this hard to do by failing to show our kids, and our people in general the way to the light of spirit. Both religion and science have created fences so high that we are literally kept out of the one place that has always had the answers, the spirit within. Science would argue that such a thing does not exist; religion, that you must go through them to find the fruits this spirit would offer, and further that there is a defined protocol that must be followed to enter the Kingdom of God. It's all BS, belief systems at play. The bottom line is that what is truly real is you as consciousness experiencing being and learning from your experiences. The is no mediator between you and the greater consciousness of which you are a part. I was going to say that created you, but that implies that a fundamental separation exists. This is not the case. The connection was never broken. This is not like parents creating a child that is a separate entity. In contrast, I can't think of what it is like. The bottom line is that there is ONE consciousness, period; regardless of the fact that there are 5 Billion plus souls embodied on the planet. You might think of each of these souls as sparks of the ONE consciousness, some brighter, some dimmer. Unlike real sparks, these soul sparks are simply partitions of consciousness with varying levels of awareness. Those with grander awareness have larger partitions and increased channels for information.

Wow. This is getting deep, but there is an inner sense that it is right. There is a strong sense that my entire life has set me up for a position from which I can allow consciousness to provide the solutions to the problems of the world through me. Further, if need be, I can do it anonymously from behind the scenes. Personally, I want neither glory nor fame, only to accomplish my mission of helping to usher in a new age; and then finding a bold new adventure of consciousness on which to go. Whether this is what consciousness has in store for me is another matter entirely. However, we'll know soon enough. Either way, it will occur as Planned. Nothing can change that now. The Dawn is too close. The time for peaceful revolution has indeed arrived and with a force that will not be denied. But, where is the evidence you ask? I cannot prove what you will not open your eyes to see and ears to hear. It's as if the trumpets are sounding and the Walls of Jericho will soon be falling all around us. And, then, what is to be done? For the very foundations of our country, America, are indeed crumbling. After 220 years, it is time to restore or replace them with an improved set that can boldly carry us forth into a new millennia. Our Forefathers were great and brilliant men, but they lived 220 years ago in a time when the way of life was incomparable to today's. Further, they simply could not anticipate the kinds of problems the country would face in our day and the services that it would be expected to provide not only within the country but on a global front as well. It's clearly time to re-examine the structure of our government and come up with a new one that better serves us in the world of today and in the new millenia that lies ahead. In fact, were many of our Founding Father's able to see what had become of the Nation they birthed, they would probably condemn us for waiting so long to make drastically needed changes. There is nothing sacred about what they wrote. It was great for the time, and has essentially served us well for over two centuries, but the pace of change now is such that this will not be the case much longer. In fact, there are already major problems. The complexities of our times are simply not adequately reflected.

Took a break from the notes for many hours to put the SOCIETY briefing into a word processing form. Cut and paste wouldn't work so I had to retype everything. The process was interesting, since it forced me to focus on what was actually in the briefing. I'm absolutely amazed at how many issues are covered in such a short space overall. Further, not just covered at the surface level but truly addressed deeply. Yes, there is a major issue involved in carrying out the recommended solutions -- but, from my standpoint that is getting to the details not the heart of the issue. If we can come to agreement at the Heart, and go into the endeavor with the attitude of cooperative interdependence, spirit will enable us to figure out the details. The bottom line is something ARONK, a channel I used to frequent in LA, used to say all the time -- the Triple A club: Awareness, Allowance, and Acceptance. These last two are essential to cooperation. The first is essential to allowing spirit or consciousness to provide the answers.

I now have a course of action in mind for the immediate future. My goal is to create a Home Page on the WWW for Beyond Imagination. I want to create appropriate keywords so that the information can be accessed by browser. [consciousness, revolution, new age, metaphysics, education, society, utopia, government reform, economic reform] In addition, I'd like to convert the SOCIETY briefing to HTML and link it to the home page. Further, I'd like to provide an introduction to the notes and start converting the months of notes starting in Nov 93 to HTML and making these available as well. Hopefully this will be fairly easy, though taking out all formatting and then reformatting may be repetitive and time consuming as well.

This does provide an opportunity for editing, and for cutting out material. However, my sense is that is important to allow the word to be expressed as it came through me. I do not feel the right to erase or modify any line. That has not been my practice for over two years. I see no reason to alter my ways now. Consciousness expresses what she expresses as she expresses. It is not my place to alter that now, after the fact. People will get what the need from this material. They will be moved to find whatever can help them. The biggest gift these notes provide are a detailed documentation of consciousness of an individual as experienced from the inside out. Yes, it is subjective; highly so. There is no other way that it could have manifest. What is provided is an example of how a particular consciousness at an advanced level of awareness thinks. Throughout the notes there are techniques demonstrated for getting spiritual information from the standard symbol systems that are part of everyday life. It's a matter of learning to recognize what your inner self is asking you to see and pay attention too. Without the inner sight or inner hearing, the spiritual meaning is completely missed. This does not mean to deny reason and the tools of the conscious mind. What it does mean is to balance one's capabilities. Because the subconscious and inner processes have been neglected for so long, one may have to go overboard a bit to allow the weaker side to gain the strength it needs to reach a place of balance.

I find it amazing that the words keep coming forth. It's as if my mind is like a blank slate. I have no clue as to what was written earlier today, or yesterday, or last week. Further, it's been several months since I've found the time to review the notes that were written. I find it curious that this is so. For the first 8 months to a year, the final step of the month was a re-read and quick spell check with a minor grammar check. Thinking back, now, it's actually over a year since I last did that. I trust that what comes from consciousness is good enough. There is nothing that I can truly add to make it better. It's still interesting that over 1200 pages have come forth, 280 thus far in the past 3 months alone and I still have part of a final day to write. That's a lot of words, covering a spectrum of ideas. Yet, literally, I have no recall of any of the detail. It's as if what is completed is done. The sense is that I get whatever meaning is necessary in the moment that it comes through. Even with the 1000 + books that I have read, I would be hardpressed to come up with more than a few specific meaningful quotes or even basic descriptions of what I learned from the book. How that part of my mind works is beyond my conscious understanding. I operate from a deep faith that all that I have learned is captured and will be recalled in the appropriate manner when required. In particular, when communication is required the process is natural, nearly automatic. The briefings essentially wrote themselves, as do these notes. Interesting, indeed.

31 Aug 95

The end of another month, and a very busy one at that. The page count for the month is a clear third, by 29 page. Fourth was 64, and second was an inapproachable 113. Ten days ago, at the start of 21 Aug, the count was only 42. So, the final third of the month has been a real marathon for note writing. I knew that the pace had picked up, but that's over 50 pages in 10 days. Obviously I'm on a real high, soaring beyond where I have ever been before, yet there is no fear, for I know that consciousness is there by my side every step of the way. We have a purpose to fulfill, a mission to perform. It's in the script, and hence will be done. It matters not whether I know what it is. I trust that at any given time, I will know whatever I must know to properly do what must be done NOW. What must happen in a year, or a month, or even a week has little to no import. The "point of power is the present" as Seth said. It is where I live my life. It is the only point where my action has utility in serving consciousness.

It all gets back to "BE HERE NOW", the classic phrase from Ram Dass. The only thing that is real is consciousness, beingness, the I AM. And, that real state exists only in the HERE and NOW. When past or future are given attention this focus is lost, and the illusion is made manifest. Once manifest, it is very difficult to return to the unmanifest real state. It does seem that current transformations are focussed on being able to more fully manifest consciousness in flesh. But, for the most part past connections have been limited at best. A few have always been there to guide the world through the darkness toward ever increasing light, though this has been a painfully slow process overall. Consciousness, being outside of time, cares not how long the overall experience takes. It will occur with whatever timing is appropriate. This brings up the idea of perfection, that at any moment the World is perfect -- regardless of the amount of suffering that may appear to be occurring. What is real versus what is illusion is a major theme. Yet, in this area, it is truly up to the individual to discover Truth for him/herself. For, in very real ways this is different for us all, and we must as Thoreau says: "march to the beat of our own drummer." For anyone reading these notes, it is obvious by now that I am a very rare bird indeed, and the drummer that I march to surely must be high on something. In my case, that something is consciousness herself. Unfortunately, I do not know how to pass on what I have become and what I have learned about what I AM, other than to allow consciousness to continue to express via these notes. The best I can do is demonstrate by example, with the idea that others will catch on to whatever degree they are meant to.

Pg 94: The Tower Exalted. Each additional page carries with it intense meaning. The question is where will it end? As of midnight tonight, the end of the month, what will the final message from these notes be? The page count is clearly a factor. The file size is the other. And then there is the content of all this information, words strung into ideas that have never before been expressed in this manner. This is the product of consciousness creatively manifesting in this world. I'm the vehicle through which the physical manifestation could occur. And, I gladly serve consciousness in this capacity. As far as I can tell, it is at least the first phase of what I came to do, as well as serving as a vehicle to foster my spiritual awakening.

Am I rambling, or is this information truly of utility? Just the fact that so many thoughts have been recorded without be edited, reveals a flow of consciousness that is not generally captured. This in itself should provide the raw material for consciousness researchers to really look at what is involved in thought processes, including both how some of the brain processes work as well as how the higher level processes of the self observing the self work. I find it interesting that after 20 years of input, primarily via reading, that I would spend the past 2 years in an output mode where what is output is only loosely related to what was input. As to how long this will continue, I do not know. But, there is the sense that I have directly tapped into an inner source of Wisdom sufficient to provide me with whatever I need to know to carry out my destiny. This provides a level of confidence and surety that consciousness will be there to help me deal with whatever circumstances may arise.

I still have a very strong sense that something happened last weekend. Judgement was passed, and I was offered my rightful position in some spiritual hierarchy. Exactly what that is, I do not know. As The Hermit, my association with others has been limited to say the least. Yet, I know within my HEART that such did indeed occur. Interesting 20:Judgement + 57:Three Swords thru Heart = 77:The Falconer [Also CHRIST]. These are the cards at the top and bottom center of the triangle reading. There is this knowingness that I have passed whatever test needed to be passed. However, what that means, and what will happen when still remains hidden. Here's where the trust comes in as well. My relationship with consciousness is secure. She will ensure that I am moved to do what needs to be done and that I am aware of whatever I need to know. I have a whole suite of tools for enabling this communication, be it inner via direct intuition, or outward via recognition and interpretation of signs in the appropriate manner.