Life rolls on. The mania is not so great anymore. I am back to what constitutes "normal" in my experience. Yet, my memories are rich with the experiences that I have been through in the past three months. These have changed me in ways that are difficult to explain ... yet are irreversable. Once again, I have been allowed to SEE the world differently and so move into a New World. This is becoming a common experience for me, one that I would not trade for the world. Each awakening allows me to expand into something grander than I knew that I was before. Also, it did this in ways that were unexpected. This keeps life interesting and keeps me going. Life could be incredibly boring were it not for the many transformations and forays into the unknown.

Indeed, prior to 1993 it was quite boring. I had lived in my mind nearly completely, and was getting bored of the world that was my prison at the time. Now, the bars are no longer present, the yoke is lighter, yet there is still a semblence of being in a prison of my own creation. This time not one simply created by my mind, rather one that appears to have chains of an emotional nature. These are just as binding and as difficult to deal with. For the mental prison, going Beyond Mind was the answer. But what of the emotional prison, does this require going Beyond Heart. And, what does that mean? It seems that I was mistaken in seing that the Path of the Mind - Wisdom, and Path of the Heart - Love, were separate paths that one could travel. It seems that we must traverse both, though our focus at any time may be more toward one or the other. The Path is toward LOVE/WISDOM, not one or the other separately. Or, at least such appears true for me.

I'm still not sure what I want to do. I return to work on Monday, to a job as a systems engineer, 128 miles away from where I live. This is not ideal, but it is what the play calls for at this time. My efforts to find society transforming work have led to naught. That's OK. I'll do what consciousness puts on my plate and continue to do whatever else I am moved to do on my own. That is what LIFE is all about, DOING what one is moved by SPIRIT to DO; using one's talents to the best of one's abilities in service to SPIRIT. And, at times, doing this without thought of reward or payback for one's efforts. We receive much in our lives. It is up to each of us to find a way to GIVE BACK freely in return for the many blessings we receive.

My way to date is to write, to allow SPIRIT to speak through me here on these pages so that all might have an example of what is possible ... so there is at least one wayshower bringing attention to the spiritual reality that is omnipresent in the symbol systems that surround us. Everything has embedded meaning to whatever depth that we have the interest and ability to look. The inner reality is mirrored in the outer and vice-versa. There are no coincidences. The songs played on the radio, the radio station call signs and numbers, episodes of programs on television on particular days ... everything is layed out in a pattern within the time space continuum. Within a house: the placement of things, the layout of rooms ... the order of books on a bookshelf ... all have significance. All reveal cycles and patterns of energy in varying degrees of alignment with one another.

When one is tuned into the energy, one can just feel what is aligned versus what is not aligned. Also, one can sense the connectedness and the points where the energy is stronger and weaker. When one lives intuitively, the next thing to do naturally becomes the focus of one's attention. There is no need to force or direct the attention. A loose and open focus is what is required to simply become aware of the next thing one is to do. To some degree, I'm in that state as I write. I don't know what is going to come next. I relax and allow the words to flow as they will, while I ride the energy wave that allows this communication to come forth. I've had literally thousands of hours of practice doing this, so it is old hat to me.

However, if you are not used to surfing in such a manner, perhaps you might find the process more difficult. Do try it though. Your inner Self is just as rich with information as my own. And, it has the advantage of knowing YOU, so its' information will be tailored to your needs. The key is to step back and watch your awareness. Loosen your focus so that you are simultaneously aware of more but not attached to any of it. Then allow your mind to receive whatever thoughts your Self would bring forth. Don't evaluate them, just allow them to flow. At first, nothing may come. Just stay open and mantain a loose focus as the being who is aware of and watching all that you do. You are whatever your awareness experiences. Be playful and free it from some of its' chains and see what gifts it can bestow in your life.

You may find that consciousness speaks to you in pictures, rhythms, motion or dance, or feelings. For me, it is words that come forth but consciousness is not limited to words. Trust whatever comes forth as right for you and be open to it evolving over time as the channel to consciousness is opened in your life.

I just had a curious thought. The voluntary work that one does in life is just as much a "job" as paid work. You are entitled to create whatever job description and business card are appropriate for the voluntary work. No one checks whether the business card is valid so you are free to create it in whatever manner you are moved to do. While you are free to be creative, don't lie or deceive. The cost is very small to get business cards made. Personally, I was moved to create two different business cards for Beyond Imagination several years ago. I still use these when I send out samples of the Beyond Imagination work.

So, this is what "normal" is for me. The mania is controlled enough that I can live and work in the world others live in effectively. Interesting that "normal" would need to be defined relative to living in the consensus world. Anyway, I can live in this world without being from this world. I am from Wayne's World, a world that ever varies day to day as I venture forth and continue the task of making more of the unknown known.

Be Happy and Create Well!

LOVE,

Wayne