Musings of a Spiritual Warrior

19 August 2005

Four days in a row!  Not bad given that I was off on Monday.  Sometimes it happens like that.  The musings just keep coming.  At other times, there can be dead silence for weeks.  Oh well, what needs to come forth will indeed come forth.  This is not for me to force, but rather to allow.  In many ways, that is how I live my life as well.  Though perhaps with more of a judgemental eye than I need to use, especially concerning myself.  What would I choose to have happen in my life.  Clearly, what I am experiencing is what I am choosing.  But, much of the choosing is occurring on other than conscious levels.  That, or I am choosing not to see what is happening consciously.  That could indeed be the case.  We all have our filters that ultimately determine what we are able to see and not to see.  We need to be careful that these filters don't filter out useful information.  I desire to see more of how this process is working in my life.  I desire to clean my glasses ... or even remove them for awhile and see the world from a different perspective.  Interesting.  I just did an experiment.  Looking at the screen approximately 18 inches away, I cannot even read this musing without my glasses.  I've become that nearsighted.  Not that this is surprising.  Hermits by their very nature are quite self-absorbed.  This focus on what is right here and close may be one of the causes of the nearsightedness problem.  But, is it really a problem?  Why do we need to judge what is?  In some cases, the "problem" may in fact be a gift ... in this case, allowing us to see things in ways that we otherwise would not.

"Argue for your limitations and sure enough they're yours".  Richard Bach wrote that in Illusions:The Adventures of a Reluctant Messiah.  Is that what I am doing here.  It is time to leave the limits behind.  But, how do we do that.  It seems that limits are a natural part of life everywhere that we look.  Yet, indeed, most of the things that limit us are self-imposed.  Many come out of our fears ... rational or not rational though they be.  The universe is a kind place, even if those who inhabit it don't always demonstrate kindness.  Your world is what you make of it.  And, each of you will experience a world that is unique to you.  Oh, this will overlap and merge with the worlds of others, but only to the degree that you allow it to do so.

I'm 47 now.  By my reckoning two-thirds of my life is complete.  What would I do with the other third.  It has the potential to be the most important third.  The Beyond Imagination expression started right around the halfway point.  This is about as extroverted as I get.  I knew from the beginning that this material was not mine alone.  It was meant to be shared.  And, I have done what I was moved to do to share it.  Yet, it seems that this was not enough.  The material hasn't found its intended audience, whatever that might be.  There is still a sense that the material is to attract me to my spiritual family, or vice-versa.  Whether it actually does this or not remains to be seen.  I am resigned to a fate that I know to be mine, a spiritual destiny that I came to fulfill.  In fact, I look forward to playing out my role, whatever that might be.  I'm open to whatever comes.  There is still a sense that I am supposed to allow it to come in its own way rather than to impose my will on it.  I don't know why that is.  Perhaps it is penance for past deeds in other lifetimes.  There is a sense that I may have misused power at some point.  This time around, I am careful not to repeat such errors.

Note that if two thirds of my life is complete, I don't expect to make it much beyond 70.  Indeed, such is the case.  That would be the year 2028 = 23:04(88).  Interesting.  2304 is 48 x 48 = The Man in Search of More Squared.  228 is the ALL CAPS sum for my whole name.  Four years earlier will be an interesting transition 22:88(88) => 23:00(88).  This brings us to the first time in the Christian Era when the 88 cycles take us beyond the Major Arcana.  23 = King of Wands.  But 23 = wayne too.  flesh = 63518 = 23 as well.  spirit = 179992 = 37:King of Cups.  enfleshed = 556351845 = 42.  spirit enfleshed = 37 + 42 = 79.  Wow, the first number past the entire Tarot.  So, 2024 should be quite an interesting year.  The following year, 2025 = 45 x 45 = 5 x 5 x 9 x 9.  The last such year was 35 x 35 = 1225, eight hundred years prior.  The next is 55 x 55 = 3025, one thousand years hence.  The difference between these years is 7 x 7, 9 x 9, and 11 x 11.  7 is the number of the Rays.  9 is the number of the Enneagram.  11 is the Master number.  I am ever going to be in search of more, am I not?  That's OK.  That suits me.  But, am what I am finding of value.  Just look at where this paragraph has gone.

Enough of the numbers for awhile.  I'm sure they are confusing to most.  Then again, why is it that I am doing this.  It is to show what consciousness expressing through us can do.  Intuition is just as valid as reason for bringing forth information.  We just need to check it for utility.  Ultimately, that is what matters.  Is something useful without harming ourselves or others?  Indeed, that is a question that deserves to be asked.  Sometimes we don't know until we check it out.  That is OK.  We just need to be careful.

7 - 9 - 11 = 7 x 9 x 11 = 7 x 99 = 693.  That is the triangle pattern in the enneagram. 

The rest follows a 1/7 pattern.  1- 4 - 2 - 8 - 5 - 7.  In the enneagram, never do these two parts meet.  It is curious that 1428 is a variation of my final four of my SSN = 2184.  Also 4-2-8 is the year that Plato was born.  7-5-8 = 2 to 8 = 228, again.

Took the short version of the enneagram test.  The results were:

1:  Wisdom  -  6
2:  Unconditional Love - 4
3:  Value - 6
4:  Equanimity - 6
5:  Direct Knowing - 6
6:  Will - 1
7:  Joy - 1
8:  Strength - 1
9:  Unity - 5

Why does it not surprise me that Will, Joy, and Strength would be so low?  I was expecting to be primarily one type, possibly moving from another type and moving toward another type following the path of the enneagram.  However, that does not seem to be the case.  It is more of being a wheel with a flat region at 6, 7, and 8.

I AM THAT I AM THAT YOU ARE!   Be Happy and Create Well!

LOVE,

Wayne


BEYOND IMAGINATION:  Creating the Foundations for a New World