Musings of a Spiritual Warrior

2 May 2005

Well, eleven whole days since our last musing.  It has been quite a busy time.  Though, that alone is no excuse.  There were opportunities to express, especially on both weekends, but we were not moved to do so.  Oh well, all that matters is the present.  We cannot change what we did in the past, assuming that such a thing as the past even exists.  What makes us think that time is truly the linear thing that we experience?  Even then, it is not linear when it comes to subjective experience.   In some moments, time flies by, in others, it drags on.  It seems to be entirely dependent on our alertness and presence in the moment.  When we fight what we are doing, things drag on.  When we go with the flow, we have an entirely different experience.  And, what matters regarding time is our experience of it.  This is true of space and of everything that we experience for that matter.  Oh, how my spirit soars when engaged in this expression.  It is as if this is what I am meant to do.  Why then am I not able to earn my living through this endeavor?  Perhaps some day.  Until that time, I go where I am moved to go, and do the work that I am destined to do.  Interesting, yet so it seems from my perspective anyway.  Still I look to find a reason to believe ... still I look to find a reason to believe ... still I look to find a reason to believe ...  Just caught that on the radio.  There is some reason that I needed to hear it three times in a row right now.  Nothing happens by chance.  Nothing is random, however it may seem.  Life occurs according to a plan, a plan that is enacted in the spaces between the moments of time.  Change never occurs in the present.  It always occurs in the interval between moments.  This is true no matter how fine of an increment you take.  At what point do we get to the very programmer behind it all?  What can be represented with computers?  How different is the current program from the concept of the holodeck in Star Trek: The Next Generation?  Is it any different?  How would we know?  How do I know that my world is similar to that of others?  I know not what they think.  I know not how they experience, or how they interpret what they experience.  Yes, we seem to live in a common playground.  But, even then, my world is very limited.  Yes, I live in three different places and work in one other.  But, it wouldn't take much to provide the physical context for the life that I experience.  Many video games are close to the fidelity of my world, especially what I see without my glasses.

This is an interesting line of thought.  Why is this of concern today?  Who knows?  What comes forth comes forth.  I choose not to question it.  I was once advised to be careful about accepting things without question.  But, some things naturally seem to warrant that.  You can't be skeptical about everything ... especially about spirit.  It seems, that for her to become an active force in our lives, we have to trust.  At times, this can be difficult to do.  But, we need to do it anyway.  Yet, in the end, the trust required is not in something external to us ... rather, it is in us.  We are complete and whole at this moment, all appearances to the contrary.  How can that be?  It simply is, and always is.  There is nothing to become that we are not already.  It is a matter of realizing that this is so, and experiencing life from this perspective.  We are free to experience any perspective that we choose.  It helps to stay flexible so that we can experience a number of perspectives.  Though, this seems to apply to some areas in our lives more than others.  Stability can have its benefits as well.  Though, too much stability can be overconstraining at times.  Here, it seems that some sort of personal balance is needed.  What works will be different for each of us, and further, will be different in different areas of our lives.  That is OK.  "Variety is the spice of life" as they say.  Though, there are many ways to find and experience variety.

Why is my existence still so solitary?  Why do I find this expression so enticing to spirit and to soul?  What is there about this stream of consciousness that makes it special?  Why is it that this specialness has not made a mark upon the world?  Why has the Beyond Imagination expression remained so hidden despite being available on the WWW for nearly a decade?  Yes, it has been nearly a decade already.  I have no answers to any of these questions.  What is, is.  What will be, will be.  It is not for me to make it any one way or another.  Why is that?  Why do I not impose any preference on the world that I experience?  Is the lack of imposition of a preference, a preference in and of itself?  Have I not made my intent known, time and time again.  Have I not said that I would change the world, that I would build the foundations for a new world, one in which spirit could more fully express in flesh?  Is such not what life is all about, the expression of spirit in flesh.  Why else go to the trouble of making worlds?

Watched Hotel Rwanda this weekend.  What a wonderful movie.  The lead character was outstanding.  How is it that the United Nations could permit such genocide as occurred in Rwanda during the early 90s?  Especially, considering the slight physical differences between the Hutu's and the Tutsi's?  I found it interesting that this was occurring at about the time of my first spiritual awakening.  "Cockroaches", that is the name given by the worst of the Hutu's to the Tutsi's.  That is how genocide can happen.  It is fueled by hatred and the highlighting of differences, however slight they may be.  In a world gone mad, where is the sanity that brings about order once again?  Here we speak of a New World Order.  But, will such an order ever come?  Or, have we outgrown such simple concepts as these? 

Continued reading What God Wants.  The bottom line was surprising but expected at the same time ... NOTHING!  If God is everything, literally All That Is, then it is impossible that God would lack anything, would need anything, would want anything.  God places no demands on us.  All such demands are of our own collective creation.  So, what does that mean about God's Will?  God's Will is for us to be free to explore and express who we are and to explore and appreciate all that God has created ... which includes ourselves and in turn, our own creations.

LOVE,

Wayne

BEYOND IMAGINATION:  Creating the Foundations for a New World