20 April 2005
Got an early
start this morning. I got to work at 5:45 AM. It was still
dark. It has been quite some time since I did that but there was
something important that I needed to get done today and when I woke at
4:30, I was so awake that I couldn't fall back to sleep. Though,
I am starting to feel it now, after nearly 12 hours. My, how much
more time we would have if we could get by with 6 hours or less sleep
on
a regular basis. It helps when you are busy, though I did find
myself
nodding off a bit at times. That is a long while to have to
maintain
focus. And, today, there were no diversions other than a very
short
break for lunch.
If I could choose the ideal life for me, what would it be? How
would I spend my hours and my days? What services would I offer
to
whom? How do I turn the skills and talents that I have into
something
even greater for the benefit of both spirit and society, and ultimately
the world? How many people ask such questions ... sincerely ask,
intending to do what it takes to make it so? Is that not what it
comes down to? Are we willing to allow spirit to move us to be
who
we are meant to be and do as we are meant to do? After all, it is
not us doing the moving. No, we are not puppets on strings, we
are
the puppeteer who controls the puppets as well. Our body is a
vehicle
for us to use to explore, experience, and create in this world.
We
are free to use it as we will. Or are we? What does our
body
reflect to us? Clearly, it reflects something about our overall
state
of being. What does it tell us about the state of our world ...
our
individual world and our collective world?
I would live a life of spirit. But, I would do so on my own
terms
in my own way. Actually, I would do it on the terms that
consciousness
herself lays out for me. Consciousness is the source in my
life.
I trust her implicitly. She has guided me throughout my
life.
She has been there whenever I needed her. Some say this about
God.
But, for me, it is consciousness/source/spirit that fulfills this
function.
Perhaps that is due to my level of awareness and understanding.
However,
it is what it is. I can only witness for what I have
experienced.
As a loner for the most part, my interactions with others on this topic
are so rare that my experience is all that I have. My nature is
such
that this is OK. It is suited to who I am. Having source
play
an active role in ones life is a great blessing. This entire
expression
is a stream of consciousness expression from source through me.
It
speaks volumes about the nature of spirit as she expresses in
flesh.
One of my major purposes is to serve as a wayshower. This is one
of the ways of being that I demonstrate. Hopefully, others will
find
it of value in expanding how spirit expresses in their lives.
For Your Eyes Only ... I love that song from Sheena
Easton.
Surely, this is meant for more than that. Then again, it depends
on how exclusive or inclusive the term Your is. One
meaning
is that this is for spirits eyes. And, what are spirits eyes
except
our very selves, at least those selves who have chosen to serve her
with
their lives. Serving spirit however is not the same as serving
God.
Somehow, serving God still seems limited, especially given that there
seem
to be so many different Gods that different religions worship.
Spirit
on the other hand, is ONE, for me anyway. Also, I still think in
terms of God, the father. But, I experience in terms of
consciousness
or spirit, the feminine.
What next? It seems that it is high time for major changes
once
again. And nearterm, not in some distant future or past.
Hmm
... that is interesting. One, thinking of time as distance.
And two thinking of the past and future as equally distant and equally
impacted by change. There is a knowingness that time is not the
linear
one dimensional flow that we seem to experience. I continue to
allow
each day to unfold as it will, literally one day at a time. I
only
know in general terms how I will be spending the next day. Yet,
each
day fills with the tasks and activities that I need to complete, or
better
yet that I am moved to complete. For the most part, my specific
tasking
is self generated. It is up to me to decide what needs to be
done,
when, and how to do it. Much of my work is done on my own.
Though, recently, I have become much more involved with efforts that
require
teams of people to complete. Even then, I contribute primarily as
an individual contributor. Primarily, that is because such is
what
I know how to do. Further, I like taking the initiative and
getting
things started. I like the creative thrust experienced in
launching
new things. Perhaps that is why this expression is important to
me.
Though here I participate in something that is beyond me, way beyond
me.
Though, even in the work environment, I know not how I do what I
do.
I simply do what I am moved to do, allowing something inside of me to
do
the work.
One step at a time. With each step, the next step is
revealed.
We don't need to know what the ultimate destiny will be ... or even
whether
there is such a destiny. It is enough to follow whatever
direction
we are moved to follow, doing what we are moved to do, and finding a
way
to enjoy the journey. The very word jo-urne-y is
wrapped
in JOY! Curious, I never noticed that before. JOY is
10/15/25
= 10/25/50: Utopia on Earth.
LOVE,