“The Nothingness”

 

In our tiny little Carmel – more like a toy than a town – there are around a hundred galleries serving any taste and any pocket. But all of them are incredibly expensive: and what will you? The rent is enormous here, and even if there is nothing hanging on the wall, the space itself costs much.

I came across such gallery quite by chance. In the window I saw an unusual picture: an absolutely black square in an elegant gilded frame. There was something attractive and mysterious about it. I stepped inside. I saw about thirty black squares of various sizes, some of them like the one in the window, some very large. And some on the contrary simply tiny.

I came up to the first square. Its title was “Void”. It was really a void. An enormous empty, an absolutely black void. It was exactly my idea of a void – bottomless and unfathomable.

The next picture was called “The Solitude”. “Well, it is really an absolutely black solitude”- I thought.

There were also “The Middle Of Nowhere”, “A Vicious Circle”, “The Atheist’s Prayer”, “My Inside World”, “Dead Conscience”, “ Inside The Womb”, “Inside The Coffin”, “Lilith’s Call”, “Encyclopedia Of Useless Knowledge”, “The Devil. Autoportrait”, “Hopeless”, “-273”, “The End Of The World”, “F For Future”, “No way out”, “A Second After The Last Judgment”, “In The Depth Of Your Glance”, “The Rainbow For The Blind”, “0:0”,  “Past Perfect”, “The Black Prince”, “The 51st Region”, “Princess Of Senegal”, “Nostalgia”,  “Requiem”, “Cloned Soul”, “666”, “Secret Mission”, “The Road To Nowhere”,  “April 31”,  “All Is In The Past”, “The Armageddon Field. The Harvest Is Gathered”. Some of the pictures were called “Untitled”.

The proprietress came up to me:

-         Like it?

-         I’m impressed.

-         Next week we are going to get some more of them. Not so many, though.

-         And who is the painter?

-         They are the works of an anonymous master. But he allows the person, who buys  the “Untitled”,  to sign the picture with his own name, provided he gives it his own title.

-         And do many people buy them?

-         It is not the season now. During the tourist season we may sell up to a dozen such pictures. But this week only three were bought. It is not a good time for sellers: stagnation, depression, you know. People have no money to buy houses, that is why pictures don’t go as fast as they used to two or three years ago.

-         Do you sell only this kind of pictures?

-         You know, I had rather a good collection of Russia masters and the business went well. And then this one appeared. At first only one. It was bought immediately. It stands out even among the most interesting and colorful works. I ordered two – and they disappeared at once. The pictures are unique, you know. You can see for yourself.  There is the catalogue: we have already sold 237 pieces – and not a single repeated title! Gradually “The Black Square” pushed out all other pictures. I keep some in the hold. Would you like to have a look?

-         Thank you, no. I am really impressed with this one. It makes you think.

-         It goes well with any interior and can decorate any space. Our buyers, as a rule, are well-off people. They understand that any picture, hung next to this, not only looks better, but raises the price of “The Black Square” as well.

-         And how much do you ask for them?

-         Depends on the size. Generally, fifty dollars per square inch. If, of cause, it has no title. They are considerably more expensive – as you understand, we provide the buyer with copyright. This here – the large one – it is forty hundred. It is usually bought for a big drawing room or a library. And that one – for a study – it is twenty three hundred. That one is for a bathroom; it is covered with a special substance that is waterproof.  It goes for fifteen hundred. This miniature will look well in the entrance hall or a bedroom. A mere trifle – eleven hundred!

-         A little bit too expensive, I think.

-         Not at all. Imagine how much wall space will occupy the picture. You cannot hang any other picture next to it. The Square needs space. The picture itself is only two square feet, but it needs wall space six times larger. And instead of eight pictures only four will do, and one of them will be yours. You see how much you save.

-         I would take the one over there. The “Untitled”.

-         I think, you are right. You made a good choice. And remember, if you hang this picture in your apartment or house, you instantly become a super intellectual and a genius in the eyes of your guests. The Square will bear your signature. Christmas is near, and I may give you a discount. The price is thirty four hundred, but I may let you have it for twenty nine hundred. It seems to me, you will give it a lovely title, and I am sure, you will get famous. I have trust in your talent.

… Now, in my house, between the fireplace and the cherry wood bookcase, there is hanging “The Nothingness”. I am very proud of this piece of art. It is my only creation. And my children somehow got quieter and started bringing better marks, and my neighbors around say with pride: “Oh, he is a real philosopher”.